Feature Writer: Ghost
Feature Title: My Story (Chapters 1 to 6)
Published: 02.06.2023
Story Codes: Supernatural, WS, Demonic, Transvestite, Cross-dressing, Anal
My Story
Chapter 1 – The Connection
My story starts simple enough and is in every account and detail non-fiction and as I remember it. It’s the story of my own personal journey. As it is still evolving, I will likely be adding to it as I go along. Littlesally666.com was good enough to agree to read and hopefully publish my personal travel and exploration as I accomplish the next tasks that I am to perform.
While I feel that the presence is Lilith, I’ve never seen the details of her face and it could also be that I’ve met one of her other Succubus that she sent to me. These experiences are not in exact order but were arranged to make sense to the reader and in some cases to me. I know she is real and that I have formed some sort of connection with her even though it took years to figure out who she was. In the beginning it was simply a presence and then later, I felt I knew who it was.
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My story begins years ago when I was in my early teens in a rural farm area. I lived in the country and had a relatively normal life except I had grown afraid of the dark. Not the greatest thing when you’re a young boy living in the country and trying to demonstrate your masculinity.
One night I woke up in the middle of the night and went to the kitchen for a glass of water. As I was returning to my room, I noticed that the sliding glass door to the patio was open, and a gentle breeze was coming in. This was far from the norm since one of my mother’s rituals was to make the rounds every night closing all the doors.
I walked over to the door and peered out into the night, it was a full moon and the edge of the yard and the woods beyond looked beautiful and oddly inviting. I stepped outside onto the patio and while I was still cautious of the dark, I felt the urge to take a walk. I approached the woods and could make out the path that led to a farm field behind us.
As I stepped into the woods and saw the play of moonlight and shadows it simply felt wrong wearing clothes and as I dropped my pajama bottoms and underwear then I felt a strange calm. Years later I realized that was the first time I had been sky clad. I walked along the path and stepped into the field and was bathed in moonlight.
I sat down in some soft grass just to look around and then lay back and look at the moon. I then felt a slight breeze, closed my eyes and my cock started to get hard – I could not help myself and slowly began to rub my body then I began to stroke my little cock. My stroking was not that of a frenzied young teen but more a sensual and slow build-up until I came, thoroughly enjoying every sensation.
Looking down at the cum on my chest sparkling in the moonlight and it felt incredible, but I soon realized I needed to get back. As I was walking back to the house, cum still running down my body, I realized that I was naked in the middle of the woods, it was dark, and I was no longer afraid.
Walking back the path I began to get the feeling of being watched and started to get nervous. My fear of the dark was returning, and I started walking faster. As I passed one particularly old tree some slight movement caught my eye and just for a moment, I thought I saw in the moonlight a female form crouched on a large branch maybe twenty feet up just watching me.
It was just a glance, maybe a couple seconds, but the image was burned into my mind. I saw her turn her head and look directly at me as if studying me. Little did I know that brief glimpse would end up controlling my life. I closed my eyes for a moment and when I looked back, she was gone but instead of being frightened.
I felt a sense of calm and walked to my clothes and put them on and headed back and slipped into bed. Confused about what I saw but not afraid in the least. I replayed it in my head numerous times and know that it was not my imagination nor the play of light and shadows in the night. What I saw was real and burned into my memory. After that I got up regularly and took moonlight walks.
My fear of the dark now gone and it seemed to be transformed into a sexuality about the woods at night that remains to this day. As my artistic skills began to develop, I tried sketching the image in the back of my mind and it always came out the same – it always resembled what later research on my part would end up being a succubus.
Since the image was a naked female with wild hair and a long tail, I wrote it off as a teen fantasy. Looking back, I realize that until I did the research, I didn’t know what a stereotypical succubus was supposed to look like but there I was drawing one tail and all.
My naked walks in the woods and fields were not completely relegated to moonlight and after that first time seeing the creature in the tree, I often felt like I was being watched and began to enjoy the feeling. Sometimes I’d get the urge to do things in broad daylight. Night or day I’d get and urges and then follow-through as though I was in a trance. Not hearing voices out loud but it was more something I refer to often as simply a ‘presence’.
I’ll share an example.
It was a few months after the incident where I saw the creature in the tree. It was late-afternoon, and I was the only one home, I was bored so I went for a hike in the woods. As I got to a somewhat steep bank in the dark woods, I looked down at a small crystal-clear trout stream. It was a hot summer day and the water looked cool and refreshing.
It was mid-summer, well past the time of year when the fishermen were usually on the stream. I walked along the bank and found a spot where the water was deep enough for a swim. I was over a mile from any bridge, so I assumed my privacy and went to the edge of the water. While still in the shadows of the trees I began to feel like I was being watched and then I felt like I was being guided thru my motions.
Instead of fighting the feeling I willfully succumbed to it. The woods were thick and kind of dark and I stopped there in the shadows for the longest time processing my thoughts then stripped off my clothes and walked out onto the rocks and felt the sunshine warm my body as I slipped into the cool water.
The feeling of being watched had become almost comforting. I got in the deeper part of the stream and swam a little then got up on a rock to get some sun. lying there naked feeling the sun on my young body and listening to the water was relaxing and I probably drifted off for a few minutes.
I stirred from my trance as I thought I heard something then got the feeling of being watched again, but this was a slightly different feeling from before. I didn’t move but opened my eyes just enough to see a man in the bushes on the other side of the stream less that fifty feet from me but well hidden.
He was crouched down in the bushes watching me. I wanted to get up to run and then I heard a female voice in my head kind of giggle and she urged me to calm. After I had calmed slightly, and my heart returned to near normal beats She kind of took over my actions and I willingly went on autopilot.
It still felt like it was my body, but I was not driving. As I gave up control my cock started to grow and get hard. I opened my eyes again slightly and could make him out still watching me and I began to wonder what would happen next. I was a young teenage boy naked in front of a man yet somehow I felt like I was in control.
I kept him in my peripheral vision and pretended to have my eyes closed, opening them just enough to see him. I had never been attracted to guys or thought about them in a sexual way but started to slowly rub my chest then down my stomach and began to stroke my cock. I looked over and thru the weeds I saw that he had pulled his cock out and was holding it while watching my little show.
As I continued to slowly stroke my cock, I saw him begin stroking. I kept rubbing my body and enjoying the feeling. I realized that it was like my body and brain were not attached. I could feel what my body was doing, and I was really enjoying it, but I was simply along for the ride.
Ideas started creeping into my mind and I was enjoying watching him rub his cock. I was excited that I had caused his cock to grow in his hand. The presence in my head was encouraging my every motion and I was enjoying what was happening. She was also beginning to allow me some input or at least I was able to participate.
I kept running my hand on my chest and playing with my cock and soon my hips started to buck and I began spurting cum all over my stomach and chest and forgot about the guy watching me. I lay still for a long time then started rubbing the cum on my chest and then I brought my hand to my lips and licked my fingers.
I had never tasted myself before but as I licked a large glob of cum off my fingers, I thought it tasted wonderful. I heard him groan softly and then he came on the ground. I pretended to just notice him and sat up and stared at him.
I felt the presence urge me I heard her say, “Go on little one!”
I knew what she meant and shot him a wicked smile, leaned back on my elbows relaxed and looked him squarely in the eyes with no shame at all. I was a young teen boy naked and dripping of cum in front of a grown man and I felt like I was teasing him.
The man stayed in the bushes for a while watching then stood up like he was going to come over to me and I was making no effort to leave but simply smiled then leaned back and opened my legs to invite him to join me.
As the tension built, I heard someone far away calling out a name. Damn – it was his fishing buddy calling him from the railroad track that ran along the stream. He got flustered and stood up and I was making no effort to get up or cover up.
He was looking at me trying to decide what to do as I lay there smiling, legs spread, all but inviting him to come play with my young body. I could feel my little cock getting hard again and twitching with anticipation. Finally, the guy got nervous, zipped up, and gathered up his fishing stuff and took off to join his buddy. I lay there for a while enjoying the feeling of what I had caused him to do and wondered what I would have done had his friend not called out for him.
Slipping back into the water I rinsed the cum off my body then stood up and cupped water in my hands and poured it over my body in an almost ritualistic fashion. Almost like a baptism. I had never thought about men in a sexual way before but loved the power I seemed to have over him.
The presence in my head giggled and she seemed to say, “Well done my little slut!”.
Pleasing her had a very strong and lasting effect on me. I got out of the stream and walked back to my clothes. Instead of putting them on I carried them as I walked back, enjoyed the feeling of the sun on my naked body and trying to process what had just happened.
I lay awake for many nights after that trying to understand what I had experienced and the presence that seemed to be able to take control of me at will. Whoever was guiding me to do these things seemed to have a wicked sense of humor since they seemed to giggle when I pushed further.
It would be several years before I was with a guy but on that night, as I felt him start to twitch on my tongue, I felt the same female presence giggle and seemed to be pleased and it felt like she was watching me the same way a teacher would do with a student that showed promise.
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These occurrences went on for several years. I would often feel the same presence and felt like I was being guided to do whatever she wanted. Overtime the guidance got less obvious but the playfulness and teasing sexual nature of my behavior continued.
In college I got a steady girlfriend and we often had sex in the woods at night. Instead of the back seats of cars it was usually in the woods or a field and even in the back of a graveyard. Several times I caught a glimpse of something in the graveyard, a shadow or movement and wondered if it was her.
Up until college, my play had been with girls and I considered the time at the stream as an outlier. I did occasionally have thoughts but never considered acting on them. Then I found myself away on a semester exchange program at another school halfway across the country. I went for a walk one night and turned down a street I had never been on and passed a neighborhood pub that looked inviting, so I stepped in.
I was not old enough to drink but the bartender just smiled as if to say, “Don’t worry about it,” and served me.
As I looked around, I realized it was a gay bar, the painting of a shirtless cowboy with unbuttoned jeans and a big smile above the bar kind of gave it away. I decided to stay and finish my beer. Next thing I knew I was chatting with a guy and soon it became obvious he was hitting on me. I was nineteen and he was probably in his late forties.
I was scared but enjoying the attention as well as the free drinks. He went to the bathroom and when he came back he realized that I had moved his bar stool closer to mine and he smiled. The presence in my head, that had been so quiet for so long had returned and I felt her giggle slightly as if to say, “I’m back,” and I had a feeling about the night to come.
We continued to flirt and eventually he asked me if I wanted to come to his place to watch a movie and I shyly smiled and nodded. On the way to his place, he noticed how nervous I was and as we talked, he learned I had never been to a gay bar let alone been with a guy. He asked if I still wanted to go to his place and I again nodded yes.
Once at his place he mixed us drinks and we sat on the sofa, one of us on each end, and started watching a movie. I got up to go to the bathroom and when I returned noticed he had moved to the middle of the sofa so no matter where I sat, I was beside him – I smiled and sat down.
Soon I relaxed and got comfortable and leaned into him and he put his arm around me, and I just snuggled in. After a while he gently put his hand was on my thigh my heart started to beat a little faster and I felt my legs beginning to open. I looked up at him to say something and he kissed me.
My first time kissing a guy and I melted in his arms and let him kiss me again. Soon we were making out on the sofa and our clothes started to fall off. As his hand started opening my zipper I got scared and got up and told him I had to go to the bathroom and ran down the hall. In the bathroom my head was reeling, my heart pumping, and I looked in the mirror like “What the hell are you doing – you’re not gay!”
I was preparing to run out the door when I thought I saw movement in the mirror. The night-light in the bathroom was dim but I shut it off and looked into the blackened mirror and there it was, a shadow in the darkness behind me. I could not make out details but realized it was the same presence I had felt since that first time in the woods and she was trying to reassure me.
I calmed down and could feel her communicating with me – not in words but in a way I totally understood. She urged me to relax and let her take control. I complied and willingly relinquished control. I was still scared but also excited. I saw this shadow open the bathroom door and walk into the dark and down the hallway and I followed. It wasn’t like walking but more like I was floating down the hall following her.
She stopped in front of a door and then slipped into it and my body followed. When my eyes adjusted to the candlelight in the room, I realized it was his bedroom and she was gone. I started to fight the urges but found myself walking to the bed. The candle flickered and I felt myself undressing.
Part of me was screaming what the hell are you doing and the other part of me was eagerly waiting to see what was next. The anticipation of what might happen made my cock start to stand up. I swore the bed was made when I walked in but now the covers were turned down and I felt myself crawl into his bed.
I heard her tell me to wait for him to come find me. Soon I could hear him walking down the hall past the bedroom and looking in the bathroom then he started to return down the hallway. He paused at the door to the bedroom when he saw the dim candlelight. As his eyes adjusted to the dark, he saw me with the covers pulled up to my chin and smiling.
He paused like he was trying to process what had just happened then said quietly, “Are you sure?”
The covers pulled back exposing my naked body and to this day I don’t remember pulling them back and now believe it was her presenting my naked body to him like a prize. He looked down at my young body and my cock was standing straight up twitching in anticipation.
He slowly undressed, never taking his eyes off me, then crawled into the bed and started kissing me. It was my first time naked with a guy and I loved feeling his body respond to my touches. I had never touched another cock and found it exciting. I was enjoying the feeling and the way my body was reacting to his touch but soon took a short break by curling up with my head on his chest listening to his heartbeat.
Soon I starting to kiss his neck, then down his chest and gently sucking on his nipples and then slowly down further with my eyes closed. I opened my eyes and knew where I had stopped – there was his cock right in front of me – glistening.
She nudged my head forward and I heard her say, “Well … what are you waiting for?”
So I stuck out my tongue and took a long slow lick. The taste was intoxicating, and I started sucking him in long slow strokes. I had never done that before but got lost in the feeling until I could hear his heart speed up and his breathing get shallower. I slowed down but continued to go as deep as I could and enjoyed teasing him to the brink several times before he warned me that he was going to cum. I whimpered a response to him like please don’t stop!
He smiled and started slowly sliding his cock into my mouth and I loved that feeling. Feeling him hold my head gently while his hips contracted, and he slowly fucked my mouth. I got lost in the feeling as he slid over my tongue. I had no idea how long he had been doing that, but I knew I didn’t want him to stop. After a while I felt his breathing change again and he started to twitch.
I knew what was coming next and eagerly awaited my reward. The feeling as he came in my mouth, his whole body tensing and then releasing turned me on so much that I came without ever touching myself. When he finally stopped depositing that delicious liquid in my mouth, I looked up at him, smiled then slowly swallowed.
I licked him clean and then kissed my way back up his chest. He gave me a good night kiss and as we drifted off to sleep, I knew that I had pleased him and more importantly had also pleased her. I fell asleep feeling like she was patting my head like a pet that had performed for their owner. I ended up dating him for several months and each time he treated me like a girl, and I loved it. Though we never fucked I loved having him cum in my mouth and was content.
I did have a little trouble processing that I could be both masculine with the ladies and a submissive little cocksucker with guys. Though I seldom played with guys there were times when I felt like She was driving and I grew to accept my place. The feeling of pleasing her was something special to me even if I didn’t realize who She was.
The next year I was back home on college break and found myself driving to a bar I had heard about. Rumor was that it was a gay bar and at that was a bit of a scandal in a small steel working town. The difference this time was I felt like I was hunting – or at least that I wanted to be hunted! I had fun chatting and flirting with several guys and again got picked up, this time by a cute guy in his thirties.
He asked me to his place and as we walked down the darkened streets, I felt like I was the girl on a date. Holding his hand and even stopping to steal a kiss now and then. This time there was no doubt in my mind what was going to happen, and I felt like I was in heat. As soon as we were in the door he kissed me deeply and then took my hand and led me up the stairs to his bedroom, he started kissing me, and my clothes were simply falling off, and I was offering no resistance.
After I was naked, he lay me back on the bed and crawled on top of me. He was taking a dominant role and I was loving it. As we kissed, I could feel his cock sliding around between my legs and felt my hips rising-up to meet his. I wasn’t just playing the part of the horny little bitch – I was one.
It was an old house he shared with his aunt, but I was assured she was out of town, so we left the door to his bedroom open. As I lay back in the candlelight of the room, I thought that I heard something and peered into the shadows of the hallway, and in the flickering light I caught a glimpse of movement and then realized that she was watching.
I relaxed and soon the teenage hormones took over and I was completely lost in the feeling. As he started to spread my legs and get between them, I gave him a hug and raised my knees and wrapped my ankles around his muscular ass. I could feel his cock sliding around between my cheeks, lubed with precum and it felt warm, slippery, and wonderful.
I realized that I was on my back with my knees up and his cock lining up to enter me and started to panic a little. He knew what he wanted and so did I, but I was scared. Then I felt her take over – she was again driving, and I willingly gave her control of my body! My wanting to do this turned into much more of a craving as I wrapped my ankles around his muscular ass and gave his full access to my body.
Every time the head of his cock slid across my opening, I let out a little whimper but made no motion to push away. My motions were leaving no doubt in his mind what I wanted. He paused and reached into his nightstand and got out a little tube of something. It felt cold as he rubbed the slippery liquid onto my ass and then into me and then rubbed more on his cock.
Feeling his fingers start to explore inside me felt good but it simply wasn’t enough. As he slid his fingers into me, I felt my hips raise up and push myself onto his fingers. I looked down and realized he had the largest cock I had ever seen, and I wanted it.
We started grinding again and every time he slid his cock head across my ass I felt my body raise to meet his and heard myself whimpered in pleasure. Soon he positioned it at my opening and looked me in the eye as if to ask if it was okay. I felt my hips tilting to the right angle and body push against him and I smiled! As I felt the head of his cock pop into me, I let out a little yelp.
I looked over his shoulder and could see her in the hallway. I could make out her feminine form and could see her nod.
In my head I could hear her say, “Relax my little pet.”
I felt his cock start to slid into me. He worked into me slowly and I enjoyed every vein and every single inch of his beautiful cock. The little twinge of pain was soon replaced with pure pleasure. We fucked in that position for a long time, me feeling my body do things I had never done and my hips grinding into him begging for more.
I felt him start to tense and he looked down as if asking if it was okay to cum inside me. I felt my ankles lock behind his cute little ass again and started pulling him in deeper. As I felt him start pulsing inside me my hips started moving on their own and I felt an intense orgasm building.
His throbbing inside me had triggered me and I shot my cum between us and the feeling was like nothing I had experienced before. I had cum simply from being fucked. I knew that she was thoroughly in control but loved what she had made me do. I closed my eyes enjoying the feeling and when I opened them, I realized she was still there watching me.
She nodded her approval and I closed my eyes again. As we both came down to earth I looked in the hallway and she was gone, I was back in control, but I knew I had pleased her and that made me happy.
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After college I got down to work. The voice or presence seemed to fade away and only rarely resurfaced. Over the years I got married, had a family. The presence was never completely gone but had faded too almost nothing. Every now and then, usually when I was exploring a new sexual experience, I would feel like she was there in the shadows watching. I had grown to realize that I also had a feminine side but over the years that feeling got repressed to the point of non-existence and I went on about my life but there was always something missing.
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My Story
Chapter 2 – The Re-Awakening
In my previous story I explained how I got to where I am now. This is the story of my re-awakening, and my first real attempt to reach who had been calling me since I was a child. Now I am in no hurry but simply enjoying the journey. More research, more learning and hopefully more experiences. Again, these experiences are not orgies or wild times but do have a deeply sexual theme as they are a part of my journey. They are my one hundred percent true, non-fiction accounts of what I’ve experienced. They can be wild, somewhat disturbing, or tedious stories but they are mine.
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The years went by, and my wife and I moved to the woods and raised several children, they went off to college and the feelings of curiosity about what happened years before began to return. I started doing more research, now with the internet the research was much easier and the results much more prolific than when I was a shy teen going into a country library asking for books on the occult.
As with most curious people the more research I did, the more my interest began to build, only now I was finding actual accounts of others that had similar experiences and I needed to know more. I started to form opinions on who it was that was calling me back then and slowly the callings began to return.
At first it was just glimpses in the shadows or simply a feeling I had. Then it was waking at three o’clock in the morning with thoughts in my head and a raging hard-on. Although I’m still not entirely sure who She is, I feel most connected to Lilith and her story. As the research started leading me to Lilith an interesting thing happened, an owl moved in near my house and I would hear it at night and occasionally see it in the trees outside my bedroom patio.
More research led me to more stories online and then to a witch’s chatroom where I spoke with several practitioners, one of which was quite helpful. She didn’t put her own thoughts in my head but helped me process mine and then, after assuring herself that I was serious, began to help me with my quest to find out who was calling me and to make some form of contact.
Several months later I had built a small alter in an in-law suite in my home. My new friend simply said to gather things I felt an attraction to and showed me a few examples from others. Mine ended up with a deer skull with horns, an oil lamp, a framed photo on the wall of an owl flying that I had taken from the yard, and a few other assorted items.
My wife simply saw it as art and since it matched the motif of the room, she didn’t pay much attention. Later I began to think she is attracted to it too and often find the items moved. When I described it to my witch friend, she shared it in the chat room and all concluded that my calling seemed to be a connection to Lilith.
They reminded me that Lilith normally works with women but for some reason had formed a bond with me. I was now wanting more so I set out slowly to learn how to perform rituals designed to get to know her and to express my willingness to learn.
I read so many ways and methods I decided to form my own by borrowing from what I read and following my inner guidance. I waited for my wife to be away for a weekend so I was alone and would not be interrupted since I did not know what to expect.
I prepped by writing my intentions on a piece of paper clearly stating that I only wanted to get to know her and ask her what she wanted of me. I will give a few of the details to set the scene. I drew her sigil on the top of some old parchment paper and a note declaring my intentions on the bottom.
I had drawn out a circle on the floor with a pentagram and had drawn symbols associated with Lilith at each point. I put on music that was a mantra to Lilith, turned off the lights, removed my clothes, lit a black candle at each of the points of the star and one more was held in a holder made from a very old tree branch in front of me.
I had poured a glass of fine red wine in a crystal goblet and had some dark chocolate and fruits on a crystal plate. I lit some incense that I read Lilith preferred and I began by mediating on her sigil. When I was very calm and relaxed, I began to recite my request.
After I had read my request, I took a small blade and cut my hand and dropped a few drops of blood onto the paper and a few more drops into the wine then smeared some on my thumb and signed the note with my thumbprint in blood. I held the paper up and held it over the black candle and watched it burn.
I dropped the burning paper into a silver bowl and after it was reduced to ashes, I poured some wine into the bowl and drank the mixture. The room got very still then I asked Lilith if she was there, and nothing happened. I mediated then asked again. The third time I asked the flame on the candle in front of me flickered then grew to twice its size and some small sparks came from the flame.
I explained that I felt she had been calling me for quite some time and that I was ready to get to know her and to do as she wished. While all the windows were closed, and the fans were off I still felt a slight breeze.
I then felt tired and felt I was supposed to go to sleep. I assumed that meant that she would appear to me in my dreams, so I blew out all the candles and cleaned up the ones from the floor except for the one in the middle, ate the chocolate and fruit and drank the wine and then went to bed.
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I awoke probably around midnight with some dark music playing which seems odd since I thought I had turned the music off before going to bed. I assumed that I had forgotten to turn it off and the mantra to Lilith had simply moved on to the next song — it was a dark tune, completely instrumental and very sensual.
I got up from the bed in complete darkness and lit the middle candle and began dancing around the pentagram. I’m not a dancer in any form but I felt very connected to the music and was very feminine in my movements and at that moment realized that She had returned, and I willingly gave up control.
As the tempo in the music changed, I paused … picked up the goblet and finished the wine that was left in the glass. It felt strange but I felt like I was following her guidance. I put the goblet down and continued to dance around the pentagram to the beat of the music.
As the music continued, I swooped down and picked up the goblet and continued the dance. The music stopped and I found myself facing the altar with the goblet in my hand. I lowered the goblet and urinated in it as I slowly began to realize the night would be a test.
I faced the altar and made a short evocation to Lilith and took a drink then faced the other three directions and completed the evocation and took a drink and put the goblet down and returned to bed.
I woke again just before three o’clock in the morning and felt groggy. The candle was burning even though I was sure I had blown it out before going to bed – I blew it out again and started walking. I had no idea where I was going and was in a trance.
My body was following her guidance. I went out the door and walked to the main driveway. Halfway to the county road I realized I was naked and about to walk past the neighbor’s house, but my body kept going as if I didn’t care. I started down the country road still on autopilot and then stopped.
I looked to my right and there was a deer path into a small piece of woods that I knew would lead to a golf course. I took the path and came out onto the course. It was beautiful in the moonlight with the sprinklers turning on and off. I started to walk down a hill to a green almost surrounded by water with a footbridge over a narrow part of a lake.
As I got closer, I felt the sprinkler come on and I continued to walk. By the time I approached the bridge I was soaked but the image in the moonlight of my soaked body was kind of surreal. It was one of those small wooden bridges with rope rails and halfway across I paused, put my hands on the rope and peered into the darkness of the water. I could see my reflection by moonlight, but it appeared different.
The reflection I saw appeared almost feminine – it was me, and yet it wasn’t. Instead of panicking I smiled and looked up and peered into the woods beside the pond I could make out movement and knew I was being watched. I saw a flicker of what appeared to be red eyes and then I heard something walking in the weeds toward me but lost sight of it.
Slowly I felt the presence of someone behind me. I never looked back. I felt myself spreading legs and getting up on my toes. I felt the slightest touch on both hips as though someone was holding me by my hips but could not see anything in the reflection but me (or at least a more feminine version of me). I felt my hips tilt up and I took on what could only be described as a, “Come-fuck-me” pose.
I never really felt penetration but was very aware of something warm behind me and a very sexual feeling as I felt my hips rocking back and forth and a calm feeling of pleasure as I closed my eyes. As the breeze stopped, the feeling of someone behind me faded and I felt like I was coming out of my trance.
I looked down at my reflection in the water and I now looked like me again. I realized I was naked and half a mile or more from my house and was being told to go home. I walked back and went to bed tired but fully aware of what I had done. I had given myself up sexually to an entity and felt good about it. It just felt right. I made my way home and slipped into bed and fell fast asleep.
I woke again shortly before light and again felt like I was in a trance. I felt the presence in the room but saw nothing but the glow of the pending sunrise. I started stroking my cock to the images and memories of that night and soon felt like I was going to cum.
My body went thru all the feelings of a great orgasm but absolutely nothing came out. Not a dribble or drop. It was if I had been completely drained. I was confused and got up to take a shower but instead I was being guided down the stairs out the door and into the woods. I walked for a while, still naked, and came to a small grass clearing and just stood there for a while then felt the urge to pee.
As a started to go I guided my hands into the stream and began bathing in it like it was spring water. My hair, my face, my chest, every square inch of my body. It was an almost ritualistic feeling and my body just kept peeing as though it would never end and didn’t until I had rinsed every inch of my body.
As I stood there dripping wet the sun poked over the horizon and shone on my body – soaked and sparkling in my own urine and very tired from a long night. I thought what a strange night and then had a moment of clarity and realized it had been a test to see if I was serious about the path I was taking and would I serve without question.
As I got to that realization a ray of sunshine shone on my face and I could feel someone in my head telling me to go home, take a shower and get some sleep – that I had passed the test. Or at least the first test. If the first time in the stream was my baptism, then this was a re-awakening. I had the warm feeling that she was back, and I felt very connected.
xxxxx
I just knew this would not be my last contact with her and I was eagerly awaiting the next visit. The feelings from my youth, letting her have control and realizing I was not always driving were nothing but pleasurable and when her presence is not there, I feel like a small part of me is missing.
After my re-awakening incident, I began to catch glimpses in the darkness. Those times when you are neither asleep nor awake but somewhere in-between. I still do not know with certainty that my connection is with Lilith or possibly a demon simply taking advantage of my vulnerabilities but at this point I’m along for the ride.
Shortly after the last story or some could call it my re-awakening, I went with a friend to his mountain cabin. The cabin is close to two miles off the county road so to say the least remote.
After hours of work on the property we had a nice dinner and quite a few drinks. We talked, watched some television, planned the next day, then went to bed. I woke around three o’clock in the morning and got up to go to the bathroom.
It was a cabin so as guys do, I went outside to take a piss. As I stood on the porch looking out over the field and the woods in the moonlight, I heard an owl hoot down in the lower field and was struck by the beauty of the surroundings. I turned to go back in I thought I saw movement to the side of the cabin.
There is an old family cemetery there and I thought I saw something move. As I studied the area in the shadows, I heard some sounds, so I got off the porch to investigate. I walked thru the tombstones and saw nothing, so I walked out to the corner of the small field on a high point where it opened onto a larger field.
As I stood there admiring the sight of the moonlight and shadows, I heard the owl hoot again and it brought back a familiar feeling. I remembered the first late night walk in the woods when I was a kid and my brain drifted back to then and a familiar feeling crept into my body — I was on autopilot again.
I was only wearing pajama bottoms and I let them fall to the grass as I stood there enjoying the feeling. There is nothing like warm summer air and moonlight on naked skin and I closed my eyes to soak in the feeling. As I opened my eyes, I felt myself walking thru the field to the edge of the woods where I had heard the owl.
It’s a hard feeling to describe, not knowing why your walking or where you’re going, just feeling your body follow some sort of strange calling. As I walked around a corner into the next field, I noticed a large rock just inside the tree line.
I have mowed that field many times and been coming to the cabin for years but had never noticed that rock overlooking the bottom field. It shone in the moonlight and seemed to call to me. I walked over to it the rock climbed up on it and sat down.
As I sat there surveying the field and shadows, I began to meditate on the beauty of the moonlit field and woods. After a little while I felt a slight breeze and then a gentle calm then heard a sound in the woods behind me. It was at first very faint but then started growing closer and more distinct.
I was facing the field and the presence in my head seem to imply to not turn around. As the sound got more distinct it was the sound of something walking toward me. I could hear the leaves and an occasional twig break underfoot.
The sound had the cadence of a human or something heavier and not a small forest animal. As it appeared to get closer, I become fearful. I’m sitting in the forest at night, I’m facing the field and the sound is coming toward me from the dark forest … and I’m naked.
When the steps got close, they slowed, and I strained to hear more but nothing. The footsteps continued again and seemed to get very close then stopped. My heart was racing as I realized the reason I could no longer hear the footsteps was that whatever or whoever it was had to be on the rock with me.
As I sat there restraining myself from turning around or at least from jumping down from the rock and running when I felt the faintest breath on my shoulder. Whatever it was right behind me and I hoped it meant no harm. Then I felt the breathing on the back of my neck – faint but definitely there.
Slowly I began to realize it was her. I wanted to look so badly but my inner voice told me, “Not yet”. I’m not sure why – I should have been terrified but I mustered all my self confidence and simply said, “Hello” as if speaking to a friend.
There was a long pause and then one final breath … long … slow … and drawn out. I could not feel the breathing anymore, but the sounds of footsteps returned but this time walking away into the forest. I sat there for a long time wondering what to do and then I felt her presence again and a warm calming breeze and I began to relax.
I leaned back on the rock to enjoy the warm air and slowly felt my cock begin to harden. I never touched myself nor could I see anything else touching me but after a while I closed my eyes and felt myself slowly starting to throb and bounce up and down as though I was stroking myself or was getting a blowjob.
I’ve never felt anything like it before. In the moonlight I could see my cock as hard as it’s ever been and moving with the rhythm of my heartbeats. The feeling got more intense, and I started to twitch and then I felt the familiar throbbing and started to cum. I came even though I had never touched myself.
I looked down at the cum on the rock in the moonlight and realized that I had been summoned to this rock and I just lost myself in the feeling. A familiar and renewed presence in my head seemed to giggle faintly and said, “Welcome back my little slut.”
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In the morning I got up and went about doing work around the cabin but later in the day walked back out to the rock to look at it closely in the daylight. There was no evidence that I had been there a few hours earlier but on two sides of the rock I could make out that there had been old carvings though they were now eroded and not very clear.
The carvings appeared to be symbols or possibly sigils. I wonder if one or more members of the old farmers family from the cemetery had possibly had similar experiences there … or possibly the carvings were much older. Either way I know that I feel the connection to the entity I’ve known forever there, and I will be back.
But as always, I seem to remain her little pet to manipulate and play with in any way she wants and I’m good with that. I’m looking forward to seeing where this all leads and the many adventures ahead but for now I feel like I will always be her little pet.
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My Story
Chapter 3 – CandyStore
In my previous two chapters I explained how I got to feeling like I was her little pet. This chapter is more a collection of short memories or reminiscing about my, “Kid in the candy store,” phase. The time when all is new and while you don’t really understand it – you simply enjoy without thought of repercussions, consequences, or cost. Again, these are my experiences and are one hundred percent true accounts of what I’ve experienced.
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The feelings of confusion with who I was and what or who was driving me grew, but not in an unpleasant way. I learned to sometimes just let go and enjoy the intense feelings of pleasure that came from my journeys. I began to realize that most of my experiences didn’t just happen but had built up by pre-planning, even if I didn’t fully realize I was doing the planning.
They were little inconsequential things that led up to experiences that just, “Seemed to happen.”
Whatever was happening I realized I was in control but only in the sense that I knew what was going on as it happened but really wasn’t in control or even aware of why things unfolded as they did.
Like most people now I began to explore fun online. At first just observing and reading and doing, “Research”. Isn’t that what someone who is caught doing something wrong on the internet claims? That they were doing, “Research”? Soon research and viewing were simply not enough, and I began planning on my own. At first it was going online and trying to understand and see what others did.
I ended up checking out an adult bookstore near me. I sat in the parking lot realizing I had driven for fifteen minutes, navigating highway and busy roads in a trance. I had on cute little panties under my jeans and my heart-rate was raising scared that someone might find out and yet equally hoping someone would. I drove there knowing where I was going like a bee being drawn to the hive following by instinct.
I had no plan just a craving. I walked in and started looking around and almost left when I realized the counter person who dispensed the tokens for the back was an older lady. I hadn’t expected a woman and was kind of intimidated that a woman would know why I was there and what I wanted to do.
She was an older woman but not unattractive. There was something about her that attracted me to her and she had a calm disposition that put me at ease. She just smiled and said hi and continued about her business. I looked at the lingerie and then the toys wasting time but deep down I knew I was here to explore the booths.
When the lady at the counter was done helping a cute lesbian couple buy a new toy she asked if I needed help. I felt a slight nudge to my body, and I walked up to the counter and nervously asked for tokens.
I’m sure she had seen many guys like me come in, nervous but excited. She started to explain her policy about how they stopped selling tokens at ten o’clock, but that the store would be open until eleven o’clock and that since it was nine-fifty-five, I had just made it.
Then in a lower voice she leaned closer and like she was sharing a secret, whispered that she would dim the lights in the back booth area as soon as she felt she knew everyone back there. With that she winked and handed me my tokens. I meekly said thank you and shuffled into the back.
There were about twenty booths in a sort of maze-like pattern with four slightly larger booths together in the very back. I started looking and realized most of the booths had glory holes in them which made me shudder with anticipation.
Each of the four larger booths also had a window between the booths of completely frosted glass called a buddy window. A quick read explained that if both sides hit their, “Buddy,” button the glass would clear. There were several occupied booths signified by the little red lights above the doors.
There were only a few guys back there which made me feel more comfortable. I walked around for a few minutes and then slipped into one of the larger booths and inserted a few tokens. The screen came on and I started clicking through the many video offerings and picked one of a cute little shemale which made me hard.
Soon I heard someone enter the booth connected to mine and I could hear their coins drop. It was exciting knowing that the guy on the other side of the glass was likely also stroking his cock and I began to fantasize about it. I opened my jeans and started rubbing my cock thru my panties and it felt wonderful, but I knew I needed more.
Stroking in a booth next to another guy was hot but not why I was there. About that time the lights dimmed, and I saw thru the fogged glass that he had hit his buddy light. I realized I had not hit mine and then I heard a little audible giggle and knew She was there with me.
Normally when I am in this sort of trance the sounds I hear are in my head and I think that was the first time I actually heard her out loud. I looked over at the guy and he looked down at my panties now clearly visible from the light of the video screen and I saw him smile a wicked smile.
He was a little older than me and hot looking in that rugged construction worker sort of way. He was built with his pecs showing under his shirt and I looked down again he was holding a beautiful long uncut cock. He had black hair, dark skin, and almost black eyes with pearly white teeth that glowed in the dim light.
He absolutely had me drooling and seemed to have an almost spell like hold on me. Everything was playing out too perfectly and I knew I was about to give up control and somehow become a willing participant in whatever She had in mind.
I looked down shyly and then up again and dropped to my knees and waited at the glory hole for him. I realized I was being manipulated into doing whatever she wanted, and I was all-in – She was driving. I saw him move in front of the glory hole and slide his beautiful cock to me. I marveled at the warmth and began to slowly lick it and taste his precum.
It was sweeter than others I had tasted, and I savored every drop. It was like his precum was a drug and I was craving more. I had grown to love that feeling of semi-detachment and simply enjoyed where She was leading me. He slid in slowly and I coated his cock with saliva bobbing up and down like a wanton little bitch.
Suddenly he pulled out and motioned for me to stand up and I complied like a puppet. I wasn’t sure if he was pulling the strings, or my demon was, but either way I simply complied. He motioned for me to undress and as I was taking off my jeans, I heard him say, “Everything but the panties.”
He looked me directly in the eyes and said in a warm but commanding voice, “Come to me little slut.”
I felt my body turn and open the booth door and start walking to his booth wearing only my little panties. As I went down the hallway with my head down I looked up and there were two guys standing there watching me and I simply did not care. He was standing there in the doorway to his booth and took my hand and pulled me inside putting me in the back with his body effectively blocking the door.
He pushed me to my knees and directed me to put my hands behind my back. I looked up at him and smiled as he pushed his cock against my lips, and I eagerly opened my mouth. He took a hold of my head gently but firmly and started pushing his cock into my mouth.
I was being faced fucked and closed my eyes in sheer joy. I could feel every vein of his cock as it slid across my lips and could feel his pulse throbbing on my tongue. After a while worshiping his cock feeling it’s warmth against my cheek and it’s softness slid across my lips I was startled to hear the door chime ring and realized that the other two guys must have left.
I returned to a calm knowing that we were the only two in the back. Even in my trance I heard a sound in the hallway outside the booth door and could sense there was someone there. That was when I realized that he had never closed the door. I stopped enjoying his cock long enough to look into the darkened hallway and could make out the shape of the counter woman watching us.
I was about to cover up or at least close the door when I saw the light flash in her eyes. Not a simple flicker of light but almost a glow. Either this woman was Lilith or she was also controlled by her. Her face had changed into a beautiful but older version of the counter woman and she had a serine smile and after a long pause quietly said, “Go on,” in a voice that sounded like dripping honey, definitely not the voice I had heard her speak with earlier.
I looked at her and then at him and she giggled in the voice I had heard in my head many times that she had locked the front door and we were the only one’s there and then I saw the glint of yellow then red in her eyes and knew that her words were a demand and not a mere suggestion.
She leaned against the wall as if settling in for the show and I looked up at the guy and he had a wicked smile as if he was in on the whole thing and started giving me orders in a calm but demanding tone. He spoke to her almost as if I wasn’t there telling her what a great little cocksucker I was and how I sucked better than his wife and things like that.
He then began putting on a show for her and I was helpless to stop him – even if I had wanted to. He held my head and pushed as deep into my throat as he could and held it there for a while before pulling it out then began fucking my throat hard and fast. I was in ecstasy!
A little bitch in heat putting on a show and there was no place I’d rather be. He pulled out of my mouth and laughed and started slapping his cock against my cheeks and calling me his dirty little whore and making me beg for his cock. I looked over at her several times and could see her smile. Finally, I could sense he was getting close.
He pulled out and said that he was going to cum and if I wanted it I would have to beg for it – and I did! I could hear the two of them talking back and forth as I begged for his cum. She finally said that he should feed his little sissy and he pushed deep into my mouth, and I felt him start to shoot. He held my head there until he was done twitching and then pulled it out and grinned.
She said in that same honey dipped voice, “Well done little sissy,” and walked back to the front as I licked and cleaned up his cock.
As I started to get dressed, he left and as I walked passed the front counter she smiled and said good night in her normal voice. To this day I still wonder if she was actually Lilith in human form.
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I went back to the bookstore several times over the next few months and always had a fun interaction with her. She seemed to delight in teasing me but in fun and playful ways.
The next time I went in she was there talking with a couple about something they were buying and looked up and her eyes lit up and she said, “Hi sweetie” to me. They laughed and she cut me a wicked smile. From then on she always called me, “Sweetie,” like she was referring to a pet.
After the couple had left she looked at me – motioned with her head to the back and wrinkled her nose as if to say that there was no one I’d want to play with back there. I was horny and got tokens anyhow and went in back. She was right – no one I wanted to play with so I went back out front to look at the other products.
She looked at me and said, “Told you,” and laughed. We both giggled and I went over to the lingerie and started looking at panties. I noticed she was watching me so for a laugh I held up a pair as if to say, “What do you think” and she nodded no.
I then found a really cute pair and held them up and she nodded yes. I laughed and brought them to the counter. She waited until there was another customer watching and held them up and said to me, “These are really cute – special occasion?”
I winked and said quietly, “Yes – my next trip here,” and she laughed.
About a week later I came in late to take advantage of her turning down the lights and she smiled when she saw me. I gave her five dollars for tokens and she handed me a handful of tokens, far more than I had paid for. I looked up and she giggled and said, “have fun sweetie”. I smiled and went in back.
Soon I was wearing only panties and waiting for someone to enter the booth beside me. I heard a knock on my door and opened it slightly and saw it was the same guy from the first time. I opened the door and he stepped into the booth. He didn’t say a word just unzipped his jeans and I dropped to my knees.
After I got him good and hard and was lavishing attention on his cock, I felt something slip around my neck – It was a collar! I then heard him click something to it and realized it was a short leash. He pulled me up by the collar looked me in the eyes and laughed and said let’s go for a walk sissy and I bowed my head and nodded my acceptance.
He led me out the door and around the booths letting the other guys see me in my panties and collar. He led me down the hall and into the main store so the woman could see me. She laughed a wicked little laugh and then I saw it. Her eyes sparked red then turned yellow again and I knew it was her.
He led me across the back of the store like he was showing off a prize show dog and she nodded her approval and dimmed the lights. He took that as a signal and led me to the booths again. He stopped in front of a couple guys and chatted saying I was his little sissy bitch and what a great little cocksucker I was and asked them if they wanted to watch.
They all laughed and said yes and asked if they could, “Get some,” too but he said no – that I was a sissy in training and would only blow him.
They still said they wanted to watch. I was led to a larger space between the booths that was bathed in the red night light that was the only illumination to the room and gave it an eerie look. I gave the best blowjob of my life and when he got close, he pulled out and shot all over my face then slide it back in my mouth for me to suck the last few drops out.
As I looked over the group of guys watching I saw her standing off to the side out of site to everyone but me. Her eyed glowed yellow in the red light and I heard her say in my head, “Good job my little pet,” then she turned and went back to the front.
When he was done, he simply zipped up unleashed me and left. There I was my face covered in cum in only a skimpy pair of panties and doing a walk of shame back to my booth. The other guys just laughed and let me get dressed.
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I went back a few more times and she always had fun teasing me calling me sweetie and but always with a smile. One night I went in right before the lights dimmed and I had on some make-up, my hair done more feminine, wearing some jewelry and my nails painted. She giggled and said there weren’t many guys but to have fun.
Again, I handed her a five dollar bill and got a large handful of tokens. She laughed and said little sissies like me were good for business and nodded to the back and said, “Go have fun.”
There were only three guys in back and I ended up sucking two of them. After they left it was just her and I so wondered back to the main store and began looking at panties. She asked if I had fun and I smiled and said yes but there was no one left.
She came over and showed me a few pair she thought I would like. She had me try on a few pair and said you know the guys seem to like their little sissies in hose too and showed me a pair of lace “Thigh-highs” and I bought them. She smiled and said it was fun watching me learn to be a little slut.
This went on for a couple months and then she disappeared. They hired a crusty old man, and I stopped going there and started looking for other, “Hunting grounds.” I didn’t see or hear her for a while but I’d often feel the need and go out and play, usually when the wife was away, and that would quench my thirst for a short time. I no longer needed encouragement or prodding in my head but did it simply because I wanted to.
The next time, she returned I was online flirting with a guy and he asked if I had ever been to a place that I didn’t know was a known cruising place for married guys. It was a scenic overlook and as he explained how it worked I could sense her presence return with a warm feeling and then I heard her voice say, “Well … what are you waiting for sissy?”
In seconds I was in the shower and getting ready to go out the door. I spent time in the shower trimming my pubes to just a little patch which looked very feminine. As I was in the shower with the razor trimming away my hair, I remember part of me thinking how I am going to explain this to the wife and the other part of me giggling with delight as the hair disappeared.
I was not able to stop myself from trimming and really didn’t want to. I knew she was back in control, and I was simply along for the ride again. It felt great! I dried off and went to the wives’ panty drawer and picked out something cute. A small g-string, barely enough shear lace in the front to cover my little cock and a little embroidered butterfly there where the t-back met in the back.
I slipped on loose jeans, a light shirt and slip on shoes. I even dabbled on a little perfume and got in the car. Driving to the parking lot felt like being on a mission. I could feel her calming me and telling me to relax and let her take control and I did.
I parked the car and watched as some would get out to read the historical markers and read the descriptions, but some took the paths to the left into the woods like they were going to another part of the park. I knew what they were up to and that I needed to follow.
I felt nervous but walked along the path through the woods and soon saw a few guys standing around and realized why they were there. I was a path along a ridge with less used paths branching off from the main one.
One guy got my attention as I was walking past him and smiled at me. As I walked past him, I felt my hands go into my pockets and pull down on the back of my jeans and my hips start to sway a little and knew she was controlling the situation.
My jeans slid down just enough that the little butterfly was showing. I knew without looking back that he was following me. A little further down the path and another path branched off to the right and out into a small field. It was a beautiful warm spring day, and the clouds were darkening rapidly as a storm seemed to be coming up.
I knew that was my path to take and felt my feet lead the way. Looking over my shoulder I saw a couple guys heading back the path because of the rain but my new friend just stood there smiling and then I noticed the two guys he had been chatting with were all smiling too. Smiling in the way a predator would look at prey — I loved it!
I walked into the opening to a little patch of grass and stopped. I looked over my shoulder at the first guy and unzipped my pants like I was simply taking a piss but then gave him my best come-and-get-me grin and lowered my pants to just below my ass and waited for him to come to me. He smiled broadly to the other two guys and said something to them and then walked to me. No turning back now!
My body was simply reacting to her desires for me, and I had absolutely no complaints. As he was walking towards me, I turned away from him and pulled my shirt off and cast it aside. Without looking back I wiggled out of my jeans the way I had seen women do for years leaving me standing in the opening in the woods, with a storm brewing, wearing only panties, and there was no place I’d rather be.
The prey had become the predator! I stood there feeling the warmth of the wind on my skin and waited. I felt his hands on my hips and pushed back and ground onto his cock then turned to him, winked to his two friends watching and dropped to my knees. He wasted no time opening his pants and pulling out his cock.
The feeling of kneeling almost naked in the woods with this stranger sliding his cock into my eager and willing mouth was exciting. She had turned me into her little sex slave — I knew it and loved it. Soon I could hear his breathing change and his thrusts into my mouth became almost urgent and I felt his cock start to twitch.
I know what follows that and eagerly awaited my treat. A small flash of lightning and a crash of thunder and he came in my mouth. The taste was sweet and as I was savoring every drop I thought almost out loud, “That was a little dramatic, wasn’t it? She laughed and I realized that was the first time we actually had a conversation.
It was all silent and, in my head, but we were definitely talking. As that guy started to collect himself, I kissed the head of his cock and said, “Thank you.”
He said, “I have a couple friends,” and before he could finish I flashed him a devilish smile and nodded yes quickly like I really couldn’t wait. He motioned to them and explained that he would go be a lookout. The next guy came over and I was still on my knees and he simply unbuckled and pulled out his cock and started pumping away.
He had a beautiful cock and I wish it would have lasted longer but I felt him start to cum and drank hungrily. He walked away and the next guy walked over, looked down at me and extended his hand and helped me to my feet.
He smiled a wicked smile and stepped behind me and as he pushed up against me and I felt his hard cock against my ass I knew what he wanted. He slid his fingers under the elastic and pulled down my panties and I stepped out of them.
I pushed back against him and could feel his cock harden. He stepped back and I could hear him undoing his pants and stepping out of them. I didn’t care that the others were watching and dropped to my knees and tilted my hips up to him and felt the warmth of his cock slide between my cheeks and I pushed back onto it.
Here I was not one hundred yards from a scenic overlook where I’m sure the tourists were reading their little plaques and learning history and I’m about to be fucked in public. I looked over my shoulder at him as I could feel him dribble some sold lube on my ass then slowly enter me and all I could hear was her telling me what a good little pet I was being. I pushed back harder as he started to get into a rhythm.
He was about seven inches and thick and it hurt at first, but in a good way. The wind was blowing through the trees and it probably muffled the sounds of me purring like a little kitten. The more I seemed to enjoy it the harder he fucked. It was something primal in me as he pounded into my ass I was begging for more.
He would slam me so hard I came off the ground. He put his hands on my hips and continued to drive his cock into me. The harder he pushed the better it felt. It started to rain and he just kept fucking me. Finally, he came in long drawn out spurts and I could feel it each and every time he splashed inside of me.
The feeling of him cumming in me made me cum and we both finally came down to earth. He slumped on my back and rested there for a minute fully spent. Finally, I felt him slide out of me and he stood up and rapidly gather his clothes in the rain and ran off to his car. I just stayed in that position for a while enjoying the feeling of the summer rain washing off my body.
I stood up and stretched and slowly gathered my clothes and got dressed. I leisurely walked back to the car and drove home. I got out and showered and went to sleep. When I woke it was dark and I threw a blanket over my naked body then lit a candle at my altar to Lilith and sat down and to mediate for a little and heard her say to me, “Well done my child,” and I went to bed full of cum and satiated for now. I was enjoying our relationship and being her little pet.
For now, I was content to fuck or suck whenever she wanted and whomever she wanted. I did some pretty outrageous things but always with the thought that I was being controlled like a puppet. I was more than okay with that feeling and began to anticipate the times the wife would be out of town so I could, “Play,” the little slut. Her little slut!
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My Story
Chapter 4 – The Lesson Plan
In my previous three chapters I explained how I began to enjoy myself and letting others enjoy me. This chapter is more about me realizing what I might be, and possibly what I was becoming. The feeling of confusion and sometimes the feeling of power. The sense of purpose, but still the wide-eyed awe of all the things going on around me. I am still not sure where my journey is leading me but am enjoying the trip. I am beginning to feel what my purpose is and greatly anticipate each new encounter.
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I’ve stood in front of my alter to Lilith and asked what this all meant and why each time I felt compelled, when I felt her presence, to tell her what I desired. One central theme seemed to come to clarity when my brain was anything but clear was that I was asking her to somehow have me reborn after I passed this earth as a succubus.
Part of that was a nagging feeling that I was not ready to be such a creature. Not that I was unwilling but more that I needed to know more. I felt that sometimes, when in a trance, I would have a conversation with her and that I would freely ask for guidance and in many ways, “Training”.
As my thoughts progressed, I began to realize that a lot of my experiences seemed to be just that – training. When I look at my experiences, they could almost all be put into one of two categories. The first was that I was the student being guided and led down a dark but extremely sexualized path. The second was that, more and more frequently, I was leading others down this path. Some were sweet innocent creatures, and some were simply pawns or toys that, like a cat, I was playing with before devouring them.
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The feelings of confusion with who I was and what or whom I am becoming finally started to dawn on me and after a period of reflection I hope I am interpreting them correctly. I am a succubus – OK – maybe a little ahead of myself but I think I am a succubus “in training”. For a long time after my re-awakening, I felt there had to be a purpose to what I was doing, and I think those thoughts are slowly crystalizing in my brain.
Sometime when I am out hunting, I feel each experience is a lesson and after the experience I almost study it to see what I’ve learned and what I did wrong or right. I am becoming more assertive in many experiences and more submissive and subservient in others. But even in those submissive times I realize I’m almost drawing out those feelings in others.
I am usually in control now and only let others think that are in control. I have corrupted others and relish the feeling of leading them down the path. I am a devoted follower of Lilith and do as she wishes but am feeling increasing power over others. I’m learning what turns people on and what they like and delight in bringing out their perversions.
Getting a shy devoted husband who is just curious and exploring online to actually meet has become like a drug to me. Almost like seducing a virgin. Their cum tastes sweeter and I feel like I glow afterwards. In the beginning I would have felt shame at what I had done and then convince myself that, “I’ll never do that again,” only to crave that feeling a few weeks later.
Now it is definitely me doing the hunting. I’ve grown to realize when getting ready to go out hunting to simply follow her lead and dress and act however she wants me to act.
I was bored and hungry and went online looking for something new and stumbled onto a site that described and critiqued gay meet-up places. I read about an area in the next state with several interesting places and made plans for the next time the wife was away on business.
My destination was an adult theater in a small rural mountain area about ninety minutes from me. It was simply two twenty-by-twenty rooms that had big screen televisions on the walls and leather sofa’s and chairs around the edges and some other furniture.
I had read that it was mostly married guys coming in looking for blowjobs and that occasionally couples came in and the woman would blow a couple guys before fucking their partner. This was enough to get my attention and the next time the wife was away I knew I had to go.
I spent the day mediating in front of my altar to Lilith and asked her to guide me. I showered and shaved, trimmed my pubes into a cute little patch again and picked out a sexy pair of panties. Off I went. Knowing I was craving sex but still nervous about the adventure.
I felt somewhere between predator and prey as I walked into the building. I was even wondering if it was the right place since there were no signs about a theater. As I walked up to the counter the woman working behind the counter was pretty and then it hit me that she was actually a guy, and he was hot as a she.
I realized I had the right place. It was basically an adult bookstore with a locked unmarked steel door on the side that I had been told led to the theater. I paid my money and she hit a button that unlocked the door. As my eyes adjusted to the light, I saw that there were only a couple guys there and I learned the first room played gay porn and the second room played straight porn.
I sat down and relaxed in a chair that could see both rooms. I saw the two guys in the gay room get up and leave so I focused on the guy in the straight room. We chatted casually a little about the film we were watching, mostly jokes or comments about what they were doing.
As I got a little more comfortable, I realized She was with me, and I felt her start directing and I looked down and realized I was rubbing my cock through my pants. When the other guy looked my way, I smiled but said nothing. After a while the tension was building but since he was in a straight room, I was unsure what to do or how he would react.
Then a movie came on and a cute little shemale started giving a hung guy a blowjob and my new friend started looking over at me to see my reaction. The only light in the room was from the large television screen and it made a nice glow. I looked in the dark corner past the guy and could just make out her form.
She was standing there with a hand on her hip and nodded toward him as if to say, “Well?”
I soon realized that she wanted me to seduce him, so I slowly unzipped my jeans, I saw her smile and then nod that he was why I was there. He looked over and I opened my jeans so he could see my panties and I caught a smile from him.
By now his bulge was growing and I took that as a sign that he was at least not turned off. He opened his pants and his cock fell out and he started stroking. It was a beautiful cock and in the dim light I could see the tip glistening with precum. I made it obvious that I was watching him stroke his cock and was not even looking at the screen anymore.
Lilith was still visible to me in the shadows, and she made a motion for me to lower my jeans … I was scared but did it. I saw the flash of her red eyes and could see her smile. I felt my body stand up and walk over to him. I stepped out of my shoes and then my jeans and left them on the floor.
He held out his hand and I sat beside him – then bent down and kissed his cock. I stopped sucking long enough for him to kiss me and he slipped off my shirt and added it to the pile.
Soon he was sitting bock on the sofa, and I was lying on my belly with his cock in my mouth and his hand stroking my panty cover butt. I guess I lost track of time or what I was doing and when I looked up, I saw five people watching me. It was three guys and a couple.
I looked at the woman and she looked at my panties and then smiled. She laughed and said don’t let me stop you sister. I was kind of embarrassed but returned to sucking him figuring they had already been watching me so what new could they see.
The idea of having an audience thrilled my new friend and he suddenly came out of his shell and was now putting on a show for them. Holding my head and pushing his cock in and out. When he got close he pulled out and shot all over my face.
I loved it and remembered that I was being watched and looked up as the cum was running down my face. I looked at the woman and she gave a golf clap to the performance. I licked him clean then got up to dress as he scurried out the door.
As I was getting dressed, I saw that the woman was already naked and fucking her, “Date” and was stroking a guy sitting on each side of him.
Without missing a stroke with her hands or hips she looked over like we were sisters and said, “Bye sweetie,” and went back to pleasing the three guys.
As I was leaving the girl at the counter called me over and we chatted a little. She asked if I had fun and when I blushed she motioned her head to look behind the counter and I saw that she had the back room monitored with security cameras and she looked me right in the eye and said that was a hot little show and that I should come back soon. I left with a mixture of embarrassment and pride.
That night I mediated at Lilith’s altar and asked what that was all about I heard her in my head saying that she was proud of the little show but that my job was to get that guy to play and that while he had been in there a lot that was the first time he had actually played, and that she was proud of her little pet.
Later that summer I went back to the theater and paid my money and went in. I sat in the gay area for a while and watched a guy give another a blowjob but then they left, hand in hand, so I assumed they were continuing somewhere more private. There were not many cars in the lot and the girl behind the counter had said it had been a slow day.
I went back to the main part of the store and chatted with her and she gave me the story about the place. They were in a rural area with a lot of cabins and vacation homes and that often the guys and sometimes couples came in there looking for something different.
She added that straight guys often came in hoping a hot little wife would show up. She remembered me from my previous trip and said it was a great show and asked me if I had on anything special, so I showed her my panties and she laughed and said she hopped I got the chance to show them off.
I went back into the straight movie room and was watching a movie when I heard the door open, and four guys came in. They were a little younger than me and as I listened to them talk it was apparent, they all knew each other. After a while we were all just staring at the screen and all seemed to want to at least stroke but no one wanted to be first.
I heard her in my head tell me to break the ice so when the girl on the screen took a cock deep into her throat, I joked out loud that she looked like she was having fun. All the guys laughed, and we started to chat a little. I asked them what brought them here and they said one of them owned a cabin near there and that they had heard that occasionally wives came in with their husbands and gave guys blowjobs so they thought they would check it out.
In my head I heard my her say, “\Well … now is your chance,” so loud that I actually looked around wondering if they had heard her too.
The last thing I heard her say in my head was, “Show them,” and I thought how?
The very next words out of the guy sitting on the other end of the sofa was, “So – what brings you here?” I could literally hear her laughing as she said in a low growl, “There you go!”
With that I shyly lowered my head and unzipped my jeans. And showed them just enough so they could see I was wearing panties and waited for a reaction. They laughed and I smiled but didn’t zip back up. I could see them looking at each other like what do we do now?
I pretended not to notice them motioning and mouthing words to each other, but they appeared to be encouraging the guy on the same sofa as me to “go for it” and he looked nervous. After a while I slowly started to rub myself thru my panties and when that didn’t work I unzipped fully and exposed myself more.
I could hear her giggling. Finally, I looked at the guy across from me who seemed to be the ring leader and he looked at me and nodded toward the guy beside me like, “Go ahead.”
I turned to the guy beside me and smiled. I felt my demon nudge me as I slid over closer to him – looked him in the eye and then down at the bulge in his jeans and said with a smile, “May I?”
He was nervous but now his friends started laughing and all encouraged him to open his pants. He was little nervous but started fumbling with his belt and I could hear my demon say in my head, “Well help the poor guy out you little slut.”
I leaned over and said relax — let me do it. With that I slid to my knees and crawled over to him and looking him in the eye, unbuckled his jeans, and lowered his zipper. He had a beautiful cock and I stroked it gently then looked down and started to kiss it. I could hear his friends start making comments calling me a little slut, cocksucker and a faggot but offering him encouragement.
I licked it for a little while slowly enjoying and then swallowed him in one slow motion. As I got into a rhythm he relaxed and started moaning. I gave him the best blow job I could and finally I felt his breath getting shorter and he pulled me off his cock and said “sorry but you’re going to make me cum.
I laughed and said, loud enough for his buddies to hear, “well I hope so” and slowly continued sucking. One of his friends said I think the little sissy wants your cum. With that I wiggled my ass to signal, “Yes,” and kept sucking as they laughed.
As he started to cum, they all commented about what a good little cocksucker I was, and I loved it. I swallowed all his delicious cum and one joked that his wife never did that. I finished cleaning up the first guy then kissed him on the tip of his cock and looked over my shoulder like, “Who’s next?”
They laughed and the next guy started unzipping — I crawled over to him but as I got ready to start sucking him he covered his cock and said, “Not so fast sissy”!
I stopped and he said, “Stand up.”
He was acting like he was running the show. He thought he was challenging me and said if I wanted to suck all of them, I would have to be a good little sissy and strip to just the panties. My clothes were off quickly, and I made a show of walking over to the corner and dropping them in a pile then swayed my hips over to him put my hands out to my sides as if to say, “Okay … next.”
They laughed and I dropped back to my knees and proceeded to suck him. He came quickly and very loudly, and I didn’t stop sucking until he was drained. I kissed his cock and looked back and the third guy was unzipping. The room went quiet and when he uncovered his cock my mouth dropped.
He was about nine or ten inches and not real thick. One of them joked and said, “So slut — up for a challenge”?
I crawled across the room as sexy as possible. I never said a word but started licking and sucking. I stopped for a minute to catch my breath and said to all them that I loved a challenge and went back to sucking.
We kept it light and playful and it was incredible. I felt my throat open, and he slid a little more in on each stroke and pretty soon I had it all the way down. The comments were great! On guy said if his wife could do that, he’d never leave home. \
They called me a cute little cocksucker and even slapped my ass a few times. When he came, I could feel him twitch but could not taste anything since he was so far down my throat but could feel the pulsing and the warmth slide down.
The feeling of him twitching in my throat made me cum and the guys noticed it and then the little sissy comments really started to flow. They couldn’t believe I was so turned on by him cumming in my throat that it made me cum.
I was called everything and loved it. Finally I sucked the last guy and while he had an average size cock he came a lot. I had cum running down my chin and had trouble keeping up and almost gagged. I told him I loved cum and said I was glad I had saved him for last.
Finally, I got up and started dressing — they asked me to come to their cabin for round two and I smiled and said I would love to — then I paused for effect and added — but I have to get home to the wife.
They loved the comment and said if I ever saw them in there again they wanted a repeat performance and I smiled and bowed to them. As I was dressing, I looked in the next room and although there was no one there I definitely saw her reclining sitting in a large overstuffed armchair smiling. As I was going out the door the girl at the counter looked at me and then motioned to the cameras and mouthed, “You little slut,” and laughed as I left.
xxxxx
On the way home from the Theater a little place caught my eye and I made a mental note to look it up. Why that business stood out I didn’t know but figured there was a purpose. It was listed as a, “Men’s club” and the more I dug into it I found out that they had a bar/lounge area, a pool and sun deck, a movie room, and a screened porch over a stream in the woods.
They had a website that hinted at more but didn’t say much — I was intrigued. The next time I had an afternoon off I went for a drive. Since the wife was working late, I pretended to have a business meeting in that area and left shortly after breakfast. I had on dress slacks and a button down and was loaded with anticipation about what I might find and had slopped on a cute pair of panties just in case.
The panties were a pink shear thong with ruffles around the edges and little butterflies embroidered on them. About as sissy as I could find! The whole time driving there I was on auto pilot just cruising down the road until I was almost there. I don’t remember any of the turns or any stretch of the road – only leaving my house and pulling in the parking lot.
The neon sign said open, so I stepped through the first door and into a small waiting area where the second door was locked. I rang the bell and a nice older man came to the door and warmly asked if I was a member and I said no but I’d come to look around before joining.
The website had indicated that first-time visitors had to pay a nominal entrance fee for the first visit and then would have to join before subsequent visits. I was a bit nervous about giving him my identity before paying but he said it was kept in the strictest confidence and that they didn’t record any of the information — except the name.
He said it was early and there were only a few people there, but he was happy to give me a tour. As we walked around, I began to get a feel for the place. It had all the rooms mentioned on the website and they also had shower rooms and lockers. This seemed pretty normal considering the pool and hot-tub.
It wasn’t until we got to the movie room that I started to see the true nature of the place and I loved it. The movie room was small and dimly lit with male porn playing on the screen and seating for a small group.
From there we went into the locker and shower area. There was a sign that if you were naked you had to have a towel with you. I shyly asked about the sign and he matter-of-factly explained that if you didn’t have a towel you could rent them up front in the lounge and that you could be naked anywhere but the front lounge.
He then walked me down a hall with a row of closed doors. I asked about them and he said they were, “Play rooms,” for those that wanted a little privacy. We walked a little further and came to the screened porch which was beautiful, in the woods overlooking a small stream.
Then I noticed there was a sling chair for sex in the corner. He saw me looking at the chair and then smiled and simply said enjoy! There was a long pause and then he said that he had to get back to the front and left me standing there.
I wondered around and watched a little of the porn for a few minutes then heard a little sound … almost a hiss coming from one of the playrooms and the door was ajar. I opened it and. It was completely dark except for a dim reddish light. That’s when I saw her sitting in the corner.
I could not make out her face but knew who it was. She was naked with long black hair and the dim red light seemed to be around her not just shining on her. Her skin was reddish, but I could not tell if it was from the light or her true color.
Her voice was the same honey-dripping almost non-human voice I’ve heard since I was a young teen. I’ve heard it in my head and now occasionally I hear it our loud. I was calm but didn’t know what to do.
Every movement she made was sensual and pure sex but in an almost regal and completely self-assured way. She simply said, “Hello my pet,” and then stared at me as if studying my reaction. I’d never had more than a fleeting glimpse of her before, and now here she was sitting in front me.
I could make out her shape though most of her was hidden by shadow and I could see features but could not make out the details of her face. I could tell she was looking me up and down then smiled.
She seemed to be looking me in the eye and said, “So you know why you’re here,” in a tone that was between a question and a statement.
I looked down and nodded my head no and I heard her giggle in a devilish tone. When I looked up, she was gone. There was no more red light just me standing alone in a dark room. I went back out to the lounge and the next person to come in was a guy about my age and not badly built. He was also wearing dress clothes and we made eye contact, but he looked down shyly.
I watched him pay and then head to the back, so I waited about ten or fifteen minutes and decided to go check on him. I found him on the screen porch sitting and relaxing and he broke into a big smile when he saw me, so I walked over and introduced myself.
He said he had heard of the place online and had been there a couple times before. I learned he had business near there a couple times a month, so he thought it sounded nice to have a place to relax. He invited me to sit, and we chatted for a while. He mentioned going to the sundeck and would I like to join him.
I explained that I was a little shy about being naked yet and he said no problem – just wear your underwear. My nervousness must have shown on my face and as he looked down, I pulled the corner of my pants down so he could see I had on panties. His smile was immediate and genuine.
He said that as far as he knew no one judged here and it would be a huge turn on for him if I would wear them on the sundeck. I looked in his eyes and he was all but pleading. I felt like I could not say no to him and his puppy dog eyes.
I went in to get a towel and then back to the locker room. It took me a few minutes to undress but figured there wasn’t anyone there to see me so I stripped off everything but the panties and wrapped a towel around my waist.
I had added a little leather and pearl bracelet around my cock like a cock ring and looking down it added a cute feminine touch. I took a few deep breaths and started down the hall to the outside.
As I walked out to the sundeck, I realized more people had come in and there were a few guys scattered around the deck. In the corner I saw him beaming and he had two chaise lounges set out for us. I walked over to him and sat down with my towel still wrapped around me and he looked disappointed.
I pulled back the corner so he could see I was wearing the panties and he smiled. We talked for a little while until I relaxed, and he explained that he was married and that he had recently discovered he was attracted to guys and especially those in panties or something feminine.
He said he had been there a few before but no one had really raised his interest until I had walked in. I of course blushed, then touched his hand gently. He had no idea I was on a, “Mission” to seduce him.
When he said I had raised his interest I took the cue and opened my towel so he could see my panties and asked him if he liked? From his cock hardening I could tell that he did. I stood up and took my towel off and spread it on the chaise and lay down beside him, the little bracelet glistening in the sun thru the shear panties.
We lay there for a while not saying anything then I held his hand. After a while he sat up and so did I and he paid me a compliment and I leaned over and kissed him. Pretty soon we were chatting and kissing and as I looked around, I realized that I was having fun being his date.
He asked me if I wanted to take a walk and I nodded and went to put my towel on, he laughed and put my towel over his shoulder then put his towel around his waist and put out his hand. It was obvious that he wanted me to walk around in my panties with him. I swallowed hard and then took his hand.
We walked around chatting and laughed and he stopped to chat with a few other guys. I played the part of the little sub sissy girlfriend. I stayed by his side and waited to be introduced and at all times cuddled up beside him.
We eventually ended up in the movie room standing in the back with our elbows on a short wall watching the movie. We watched for a little while then he slid up behind me and I could feel his cock hardening.
I leaned back over my shoulder and kissed him and then wiggled my ass onto his cock and I felt him shudder. I reached back and opened his towel and tilted my hips up in that way all girls have learned to do and lowered the back of my panties. A little wiggling and I could feel his cock slipping across my little hole.
A couple times he paused with the head of his cock right there and would move forward a little and I’d feel the head slip in, and I’d let out a little purr. Finally, he put his hands on my hips and was teasing my hole with his cock.
Sliding just the tip in and then holding it there. I wanted him! I closed my eyes and when I opened them, I could see her in a dark corner just standing there, and she nodded her approval.
I took his hand and led him out to the screen porch. I sat him down in a chair and sat down at his feet between his knees like a good little sub and watched the stream for a while. I explained that I loved what he was doing to me in the movie room but that I had to take a break and slow down.
He laughed and I turned around and took a long lick on his cock. I licked it from below the balls to the tip. I licked his balls and then took each one gently into my mouth as I looked up at him then started a slow sensual blowjob.
He was getting into it when a couple guys walked by the doorway and he pulled me away saying someone was going to see me and I looked up at him and smiled and said, “So – let them watch,” then continued to suck him.
After a while I knew I wanted more and looked at the corner and saw the swing. I needed no encouragement — I knew what I wanted! I kissed the tip of his cock and nodded in the direction of the sling and he beamed.
He asked if I had ever used one and I nodded no — then he asked if I wanted to, and I emphatically nodded, yes. He said he would be right back and came back with a cute little smile as I saw that he had bought condoms and lube at the front counter. I got up walked over to him and gave him a deep kiss.
He picked me up and sat me in the sling. The way he picked me up so easily I felt like a little girl. He slipped his hands up my thighs and pulled my panties down. I lifted my hips like I had seen woman do so many times before and knew why they always smile — they know what’s coming next! I looked down and my little jeweled cock ring was the only thing I had on, and it looked so feminine.
He opened the lube and slowly applied it to my hole as I closed my eyes enjoying his fingers inside me, knowing that was just the start. He then handed me the condom and I put it on him giddy with anticipation.
He pushed my knees apart and stepped up and I could feel him positioning his cock and I lay back and enjoyed every inch as he slowly worked into me. I leaned forward and kissed him, and he started pushing in and out slowly building up a rhythm.
I could have done that all day, laying next to a stream with a cute guy fucking me was pure bliss, and I closed my eyes to enjoy it. I don’t know how long we were fucking but I heard a voice and opened my eyes and saw that four or five guys had not only come on the porch but were setting up their chairs around the sling to watch.
My new friend looked at me as if to say is this okay? I looked at him and put my ankles behind him and pulled him deeper into me. With that he started really fucking me, driving his cock in slow and deep. I was in ecstasy and began to forget about the guys watching and concentrated on my, “Date,” and how I knew this is what She wanted me to do today.
To take this once shy guy and have him perform with me. We built up until I could sense he was about to cum and even though he had a condom on I could feel him start to twitch inside me. His twitching triggered me, and I started shooting cum on my own chest. I could hear the other guys talking about how hot that was. All I cared was that my date and I had cum and that She was pleased with me.
After we came back to earth and he slipped out of my little hole I got out of the sling and gently took off his condom and put it in the trash then dropped to my knees and licked his cock and balls clean and then stood up, hugged him, and led him to the showers.
He bathed me and treated me like his girl that he had just fucked and I loved it. He had to go so I helped him dress then walked him to the door and kissed him good-by. The owner was one of the guys had caught our little show and he just winked at me and smiled. I got dressed and left. I had come here and done what she had wanted me to do, and I knew she was pleased.
xxxxx
A few months later I got the urge to go back. I’m not sure why I picked this night in the middle of the week but the wife was traveling and I just had that urge and I knew She wanted me to go. The owner took my membership money and explained that tonight was a special night and that while I had paid for the, “Day pass” that he was giving me a little bracelet that let me stay late for the party.
He said it was a couple of times a year party and that there would be food and drinks and a lot more guys. I thanked him for not charging me for the big party and got a drink. As more people came in, I started roaming around and saw a few guys kissing and even one giving another guy a blow job but nothing too wild.
As it got later and I saw some guys disappear into the playrooms for a little more privacy. I went in one of the private rooms and closed the door to relax for a minute. I felt like I needed direction — I wanted to know why I was there.
I felt her presence and opened my eyes and as my vision adjusted to the darkness I could make out her shape in the corner. She was reclined back in a corner and studying me. I broke the silence and asked her why I was there.
She studied me for a little more, then in her sultry voice said simply, “To have fun my pet.”
I started to ask her what she wanted me to do and she was gone. I didn’t fully understand, but the implication was there — simply enjoy. I roamed around for a while then started chatting with three guys that seemed a little nervous but still having fun.
They explained that they had heard about the place and didn’t really know each other but had started chatting when it appeared they were the only ones there that didn’t know anyone. I laughed and said I had only been there a few times and joined them.
We all chatted a while and pretty soon one of them mentioned that he was married, and his wife would divorce him if she knew he was there, and the others looked at each other and sheepishly admitted them too.
I smiled and said that makes four of us. I looked at the guy who had first said his wife would not be happy about him being there and leaned over and kissed him and said what would she say about that, and everyone laughed. With that everyone loosened up and we all chatted and had a few drinks.
Eventually the room got loud so we went to one of the private rooms but left the door open. I knew what I wanted to do and ended up sitting between two of the guys and leisurely put a had on their thighs.
Every time we laughed at something I slid my hand up a few inches. Finally, I leaned my head back and started stroking them. I asked them what they liked to do with guys and they all three said together that liked getting oral and that their wives had pretty much stopped giving it to them.
I didn’t say a word and finally one guys asked — well what about your wife and I giggled and said she still gave great head but that maybe I occasionally wanted to be her. They all looked at each other and together unzipped like it was a joke. I didn’t miss a beat and dropped to my knees.
I started sucking the first guy and when I looked up, I realized they had formed a circle around me and all had their cocks out. After I had sucked each a little, I started taking turns and was loving being the literal center of attention one of the guys looked down and said something about me being a sissy.
The other guys looked at him and realized he was looking down the back of my jeans and they could see the back of my panties. I had on a purple shear pair with a full back but little ruffles all around the openings.
They wanted to see so I stood up and showed them. They seem to approve so I wiggled out of my jeans and threw them in the corner. I kissed them all then dropped to my knees and continued to suck them merrily going from one to another cock.
Every time one would get close, I’d kiss his head and move to the next one. The first two guys were about six inches but the last guy must have been eight inches or more and thick and I knew I wanted him last.
The first guy started to get close and warned me he was about to cum. I smiled and said, “Unlike your wife I happen to love cum,” and slowly sucked him back down.
Soon he was ready to cum again, and I slowed until I could feel him start to twitch and I stopped and just let him cum. When he was done, I opened my mouth and showed him the cum and then swallowed and started sucking the next guy. When he was about to cum, he pulled out and said I know you like cum you little slut but I cum a lot.
I lovingly rubbed his cock on my cheek then started sucking again. He took my head in his hands and started pumping into my mouth. Soon I could hear him get close and then he started shooting — he did not disappoint and just kept shooting. I could not keep it all in my mouth and started swallowing.
I don’t know how much he came but it was way more than most. I gulped it all down like it was my last meal and then licked up his slit and kissed his head and thanked him. I took a little break, and the biggest guy took my hand led me out into the room with the other guys near the movie room and said he wanted to do me with the others watching.
I gave him a kiss and whispered in his ear, “Let’s give them a show.”
We kissed then I dropped down and opened his jeans and started sucking him. If I had a cock that big I’d want to show it off too. He got close but I realized I didn’t want him to cum just yet. He pulled his cock out of my mouth and then helped me to stand up.
I figured he was just taking a break until he kissed me then turned me around and pulled my hips against his. We were in a dark area of the main room and guys were watching. I arched my back and pushed into him, as he started to pump against me like he was slowly fucking me from behind and I was softly moaning and going with it grinding against him.
I felt his hands ride up my sides and felt my panties being pulled down and did nothing to stop him. I stepped out of the panties and spread my legs and got on my toes. I felt his cock start to rub around my hole and I was transformed into a little bitch in heat.
I only cared about being fucked – nothing more. I looked down and in the dim light I could see my neatly trimmed pubic hair had matted into the shape of an inverted cross. I knew it was her doing and looked around and saw her in a dark corner, standing behind everyone smiling.
Since there were no women allowed in the club, I assume I was the only one that could see her. She lifted a glass to me like she was toasting me then nodded her approval. I tilted my hips up and slowly slid back onto his cock. He was large but it didn’t hurt at all as I felt him slide into me.
He put his hands on my hips and started fucking me gently then harder. I fucked him as well as any little slut could and as he started to cum. I had no intention of letting him pull out. Feeling him twitch inside me was everything I wanted at that moment. Feeling him cum in me triggered me again and I shot my cum.
When he was done the guys standing around us gave us applause for the show and as he slid out of me, and I stood up and took a bow. I giggled and led him into the locker room and helped him shower.
After that I got dressed and left without cleaning up. I drove home content that I had done exactly what she wanted. When I got home, I lit a candle on her altar and was still covered in cum and reeking of sex I thanked her for making me the little slut that I am.
As I looked down, I saw that my pubic hair was still matted in the shape of an inverted cross and I smiled and fell in bed — I could clean up tomorrow but for tonight I wanted to sleep covered in cum inside and out smelling of the guys who had cum on me and my hair matted into a shape marking her territory.
After all these years I finally think I realize my purpose.
xxxxx
My Story
Chapter 5 – The Wife
In my previous four chapters I explained how I got to where I am today. One of the things I’ve struggled with is most of these activities are of course without my wife’s knowledge. While that bothered me for a while I feel like my presence or demon has guided me thru this. While I don’t feel she has the same calling or direction as me I do feel that she has occasionally been nudged into certain behaviors.
The odd thing is that after these experiences she doesn’t appear to remember all the details but is simply left with vague memories and an overall thought of a pleasant experience. She has put this off a few times as having too much to drink. I know that she had a few drinks but not nearly enough to lower inhibitions to the point of being a different person.
Whether these, “Episodes” are for my benefit or that she is also being influenced by her own demon remain a mystery. Either way I am enjoying a life most guys only fantasize about. This chapter happened after my re-awakening where I was trying to make sense of all of it and my place in the grand scheme of things. I realized the connection to my demon and began to see a path.
xxxxx
Let me start by saying that my wife is a hot little minx at five-foot-two-inches tall, perky tits and a great ass. When we started dating, she was a virgin and stayed that way for an extended period.
She was a good little Catholic girl but eventually fell to the same base drives we all have. The one thing she was above all else though was a flirt. She flirted enough with others in front of me that they all thought I was getting laid way before I was.
Our sex life grew, and she was not against trying new things and we would go to nude beaches, and she had no issue showing off her, “Assets”. The years went by, and our sex life was great then we met a couple that we clicked with, and I eventually figured out they were in the, “Lifestyle,” — code name for swingers.
We hit it off and they would flirt and hit on her occasionally but played it cool. Eventually they shared that they belonged to a private, “Adult” club and invited us to join them. After a short discussion with the wife, she agreed to go but said she likely would just watch and observe.
The night came and she dressed sexy in a party dress and heavy make-up and looked hot! On the way she kept reminding me that she would likely not, “Do” anything but just wanted a night out. We went in and got a tour, had a nice evening of dinner, dancing and flirting.
Toward the end of the night a hot little blonde kept asking her to dance and pretty soon the two of them were getting a bit touchy. Our host couple kept winking at me and pointing to her and smiling when it was obvious there were some sparks going on between them.
I lost track of my wife for a little while and went for a walk in and found my wife and new friend kissing in a darkened corner. When she turned to me, she was blushing and averted her eyes. I walked up and whispered in her ear that I found it hot and to, “Have fun.”
She looked at me for a long time and then said, “Are you sure?” and I smiled.
She whispered in the blonde’s ear and the blonde looked at me and said they were going to take a walk and giggled. I went to the bar to get a drink and 20 min later the blonde was standing in front of me and didn’t say a word. She looked me in the eyes and then smiled and took my hand and led me upstairs to the private, “Play” rooms. She opened the door and there lay my wife naked and giggling.
They patted the bed for me to sit and then the blonde stepped out of her dress and was also naked. It was obvious she had dressed just enough to come get me. They kissed and before long were in a hot sixty-nine and I was mesmerized.
Finally, they paused, and the blonde said to my wife that it looked someone had on way too many clothes and they both laughed and undressed me. My wife kissed me, and I looked over at the blonde and said, “You taste delicious” indicating I could taste her pussy on my wife’s tongue.
My first threesome! While I only fucked my wife, I did lick both their pussies and got a blowjob from both of them with them giggling about competing for the prize — which I was happy to share. When I came my wife pulled off my cock and they both licked the cum off me then kissed.
An incredible first-time swinging experience. On the way home my wife was silent for a long time, and I was afraid regret was beginning to seep so I asked her what was on her mind. There was a long pause then she looked up at me and giggled and asked when we could go back.
We went a few more times and occasionally hooked-up with couples mostly for what was called, “Soft swap” which is where the women can fuck each other, and their spouse and the guys can get oral from both girls but only fuck their own wife.
This was great and neither of us had any complaints. This led to her eventually having sex with several couples as long as she made the guy use a condom. Each time we would discuss boundaries and then have to set a new one and that was fun. We were experimenting, learning, and having really fantastic sex.
Halloween was rolling around and we discussed going to the party at “the club”. It was my wife’s idea and she hinted she had something special planned. She helped me pick out a Dracula costume.
I was going as a rich well-dressed Dracula with white tux shirt, jeweled pendant, cape and a little makeup for dramatic effect. She would not tell me her costume and said it was a surprise.
On the night of the party, she dressed in sexy jeans and top and extra make-up but said that she and the other girls were dressing at the club and produced a bag. I quizzed her on the way, but she smiled and said you’ll see. When we arrived, she met the girls and up the stairs they went to get ready.
The guys were stuck at the bar. One-by-one the other wives came down the stairs in a variety of costumes the couples walked off and the party was getting underway. I finally saw her come down the stairs and swallowed hard. She had on black heels laced to her knees, lace thigh-highs, a leather corset and black enamel jewelry around her neck.
She had redone her make-up and teased her already full dark hair. Her skin was pale, her lips dark red and she had put extensions on her nails and they her were long and black. Stunning! But the thing that stood out the most was her leathery wings.
She had bought a pair of wings that looked like worn black leather and they attached to her back under the corset and around her shoulders and her hair hid the straps. She found me in the crowd and giggled and asked if I liked? I told her I loved it and she said that every Dracula should have a sexy succubus on his arm. I didn’t even know she knew the word but was not going to question now.
We made our way around the room chatting and flirting with folks and admiring costumes but as the night wore on I noticed her flirting was becoming more sexual. I lost track of time and soon I realized she was off flirting on her own and really getting into the role.
I took a seat at the bar got a drink and decided to just enjoy the show. The more she flirted the further she went and she occasionally look over at me to see if I was watching. I’d raise a glass in a mock toast, and she would laugh.
Finally, she started chatting with a guy and I noticed she was snuggling up more than before and I was getting hard just watching. He asked her to dance a slow song and soon they were kissing, and she appeared lost in the feeling but then looked up at me and I saw her running the backs of her nails up the front of his pants, and they were giggling back and forth.
She looked over at me then openly rubbed his cock through his pants and I could see her bit his ear. She bit his ear then whispered something and he nodded yes. She led him by the hand straight over to me, looked me in the eye and in a playful tone said, “I’m taking him upstairs to fuck!”
I was stunned and so was he but off they went with her leading him up the stairs. She had never gone off with a guy alone and I was filled with mixed emotions. About 30 long minutes later I saw him come down the stairs smiling. A few minutes later she appeared and had that fresh fucked glow all over her face.
She looked over at me and winked devilishly and walked across the room to another group of people. Soon she was flirting with another guy and the same thing transpired, she bit his ear then whispered and he nodded yes then up the stairs they went with her looking over at me and giving me the same devilish grin. Again, the guy came down smiling followed by her several minutes later.
This time she came straight over to me with an almost worried look. She looked up at me and said sorry I just couldn’t help myself, I’ve always wanted to be the little slut – just for a night. I joked that it was the costume and that after all she was a succubus. I assured her that I found it hot watching her hunt her prey.
We had a drink and after she knew I found her behavior a turn on she became more blatant. I looked at her and said, “Well little succubus don’t you have someone to suck,” she giggled and turned to walk off.
As she started to walk away, I nonchalantly said to her, “Have fun just don’t run out of condoms.”
She looked back at me and winked and went hunting! The next guy she led past me before leading him upstairs. As she walked by she slipped a note in my hand and kept walking. The note simply said ten minutes — room 247 — that was a long ten minutes, but I found room 247 and it was in the far back of the building through what felt like a maze. The door to room 247 was slightly ajar and I peeked in.
There was my shy little wife naked except for her wings and riding him like a porn star. Her hips were grinding like I’ve never seen them grind and as she lifted her ass up I saw his huge cock sliding in and out of her hungry pussy. She sensed that I was watching and looked over her shoulder at me with an evil grin and never broke stride.
She mouthed, “I love you” and kept fucking him in long, slow, deep strokes.
I heard her say things to him about fucking her I had never heard her say and making almost animalistic sounds. She was in heat. Finally, I could hear him getting close and he asked her if it was OK to cum in her and she just laughed and spread her arms out and just kept fucking him.
It was clear that she wasn’t stopping him and she had just given him the go-ahead. I kept watching and realized that I was watching his cock slide in and out of her cunt bare. I heard him cum and that set her off and they both came together. She slumped onto his chest as his cock slid out of her pussy.
Even after cumming he was still huge. I watched in the candlelight of the room as his cum started to drip out of her pussy in big white globs. He lay back spent and she crawled off him and kissed her way down his chest and started lapping their combined juices off his cock like a kitten licking cream from a bowl.
When he was clean she sat up and reached down to her dripping cunt and scooped up the cum on her index finger and started licking it off like it was desert. She looked me in the eye as she licked off a huge glob and smiled. I walked away with a mix of emotions from anger to disbelief.
I sat down at the bar and got another drink and waited. This time when she came down there was no apology and no shyness. Instead of wearing the corset she had on a small leather thong with silver accents on it. She walked around almost naked like it was completely normal and soon had the attention of a small group of guys who were all touching her and it was obvious they were hoping one of them would get lucky.
She had re-done her makeup and looked fresh except for the glow so I’m sure these guys were all hoping to be her, “First.”
She danced with each of them still flirting and having fun. She looked over at me and motioned for me to join them. There were three younger men and she introduced each one to me like they were old friends and told them I was her husband.
They looked like someone kicked them and I’m sure they felt that there was no way they were getting laid now. One of them suggested they should probably go but she pulled him back and kissed him. They all looked at me to gauge my reaction and I laughed and said to them, “Well she is a succubus,” and they all laughed.
The flirting got more sexual and I was wondering which of them she was going to choose when one of them asked her what she wanted to drink. She giggled and looked at me and then said, “All good succubus’ love cream … how about a white Russian,” and they all laughed.
With that she started openly rubbing their cocks as she flirted with them kissing each when they made a comment. When they brought her drink, she licked some from the glass then looked at the glass and purred that there was not enough cream and made a pouty face.
They all looked at each other and she said to the group, “Why don’t we take this party upstairs?”
She turned to me and took my hand and starting walking for the stairs. The three guys looked at me and I shrugged my shoulders and motioned for them to follow. She never looked back as she swayed her ass up the stairs. When we got to room 247 she turned and smiled, she walked in, turned to face us and shimmied out of her thong.
She walked up to the tallest one like a cat stalking its prey, wrapped her arms around his neck and started kissing him deeply. There was no doubt what she wanted. She stopped, lay back on the bed seductively and asked why they were still dressed. She looked at me and said you too, and started to purr as she was presented with the first guy’s cock.
I’ve never seen a woman so hungry, and she was treating each and every cock like it was special. The first guy finally joked and said I think this little succubus needs more cream and she let out a cute little whimper. She crawled in front of him and started sucking as another guy got behind her.
Her little hole was soaked, and he just slid right in on the first thrust. Soon the other guy and I were playing with her tits and watching the first two pound into her. I heard the first guy ask if she was ready for her cream and she grunted a cute little grunt as he began to shoot into her mouth.
When he was done, he pulled out and fell on his back and she reached over to me and started sucking me. The other guy behind her grabbed her by the hips and she started bucking back against him begging for more and he pumped in and out of her as hard as he could.
She was making sounds that seemed like she was speaking in tongues, and I pulled out of her mouth to keep from being bit. They finally slowed into a sensual rhythm and the guy couldn’t take it any longer and filled her well used pussy.
She stayed in that position with her pussy in full display and her face buried in a pillow enjoying post orgasm bliss. Another guy got behind her and rubbed his cock against her dripping hole and she said, “Yes please,” and he fucked her.
She finally rolled on her back with her dripping pussy on full display and said thank you – I needed that, and they all got up to go. I was getting dressed too and she said, not so fast mister, and pulled me in for a big kiss. It was different kissing her knowing she had been sucking and fucking all night, but I found it hot.
They all dressed and left. She pulled me on top of her and wrapped her ankles around my ass and we fucked like that until I dumped my load in her overflowing pussy. She licked me clean of everyone’s cum and then curled up on my chest and mumbled, “Lick me.”
I didn’t move and she slid me on my back, crawled up on my chest and started crawling forward. I had never licked her pussy when I had cum in it let alone all the guys tonight. As her pussy hovered inches from my face, I could see all the cum and juices smeared everywhere and was strangely turned on.
I started kissing tenderly and in no time was licking her from back to front and listening to her moan softly as I lapped away until she was clean. She slept like a baby on the way home and when she woke up the next day it was as though she remembered only parts of the night.
She appeared to know she had sex but said it was all kind of foggy. To this day I don’t know if she has her own demons driving her actions or if Lilith was just having fun with her.
xxxxx
We had a fun sex life with lots of adventures but never again quite like that. As time passed, we slowed and would only occasionally visit the club then even that slowed and finally stopped. We got caught up in life and kids and work and it wasn’t until my “Re-awakening,” that her inner demon made a reappearance.
In an attempt to reignite her fire, we started talking about experimenting and maybe playing around again and I admitted to her that playing with another couple or me with another woman (I didn’t mention guys) was okay but what really turned me on was her with another guy.
She still liked to flirt so I began to encourage her to flirt a bit. She did and I felt my Lilith encourage me to push her a little further. Never outward pushing but more suggestions and guiding her to events where she thought it was her idea.
Finally, we were going out and she was flirting openly and having fun and I was starting to refer to her as my hot little cougar since the guys she flirted with were almost always younger hot guys. After a fun night out I told her she should post an ad on a dating website, “Just for flirting,” and she said no but was obviously intrigued.
Eventually I showed her a cougar dating site and she agreed to put an add just to see what happened. She was run over with offers and loved the flirting and eventually I dropped a few hints that if she wanted to meet one of the guys for drinks it was OK with me. She asked what if it went further and I laughed and said, “Well you would be on a date” and winked.
A few weeks later she told me she had a happy hour date with a guy, and would I go just to make sure it was safe. I loved watching her from across the bar but knew she wasn’t really turned on. She gave him a kiss at the car and never saw him again. This happened a few more times and always the same thing — just no chemistry.
Finally, she said she was taking down the add since all she was meeting was losers. I forgot about the site and then one Friday at work I get a text that said simply, “Don’t make plans for tonight,” — a long pause then the second text, “I have a date!”
I was hard at work all day. When I got home, she was in the shower getting ready and explained she had not turned off the add and that she been texting a guy. She said she was giving it one last try but had no real expectations. I saw her in the shower trimming her pussy to a cute little postage stamp of hair then picking out her hottest clothes.
She said they were meeting at a bar with a great band and that she wanted me to drive her there and then go in separately and hang out until she texted me that he seemed normal and safe. I dropped her off then parked and went in and walked right past her and took a seat where I could see.
When he walked in, I knew immediately it was her date. She is a hot little Cougar about five-foot-two-inches, one hundred and five pounds and a great ass — he was six-foot-three, two hundred and thirty pounds and about fifteen years younger.
They hit it off from the start and I soon got the, “You can go!” text.
I texted her that I was going to a card game and would pick her up when she was ready. I let her see me going out the front door and then came back in another entrance. She was so into him she never saw me. I watched them laughing and dancing and I thought they made a cute couple.
Soon they were flirting and when he leaned in and kissed her, she did not pull back at all. Soon they were openly kissing, and each kiss lasted a little longer. I got another text from her saying that they were having a good time, and would it be, “okay” if he drove her home.
She followed up with a text that said they were going to watch a movie and that since it was a first date nothing was going to happen. I texted that I was still at the card game at the neighbors and that I’d likely be all night so to, “Have fun.”
She texted back, “We’ll see.”
Then she whispered something in his ear, he paid the tab as quick as he could and out the door they went. I gave them about fifteen minutes then followed. When I got home, I parked at the neighbors who were having the card game and walked the ¼ mile to the house.
Living in the woods I knew I had some privacy, so I walked around to the basement man-cave and peeked in. They were sitting on the sofa watching a movie and I can’t say I wasn’t a little disappointed. I was about to leave and go to the card game when they started kissing. I wasn’t going anywhere.
The kissing escalated rapidly and soon they were making out like teenagers who were alone in their parents’ house. He had her shirt open and playing with her tits and she was rubbing his cock through his jeans. He opened her jeans and slid his hand down to her pussy and she ground into his hand.
She finally pushed him away playfully and got up to make them drinks at the bar. She looked like she was trying to adjust her jeans behind the bar since she had walked over with then unzipped and open. When she walked from behind the bar to deliver his drink, I saw that the little slut wasn’t adjusting her pants — she had removed them, and her panties.
She walked over wearing a little lace top and nothing else and presented him his drink with a smile. They started making out again and soon she had his shirt off and his pants open and that’s when I saw a huge smile on her face and realized he was huge. He was about 9” and thick and she looked like she had won a prize.
She gave no resistance as he fingered her to a quick orgasm. She crawled up on his chest and started grinding onto him and as I watched her sliding back I realized his uncovered cock was probably rubbing against her pussy. The look on her face was pure lust.
She paused then kissed him and then whispered something in his ear then sat up. She got a worried look on her face, then got up and picked up her phone. I was afraid she had changed her mind — nope!. My phone buzzed and I saw the text — “we’re having fun just talking — but could you give us more time?”
I texted back that I would stay at the game and not come home till she texted he had left. She didn’t even reply but walked over to where he was laying on the sofa leaned in and said something to him and then stood up, giggled then pulled her lace top off and threw it over her shoulder then kissed him again then helped him out of his jeans and underwear and added them to the pile.
She smiled with pure lust and she looked almost possessed as she crawled back on top of his chest and kissed him deeply then slowly started sliding back. This time when I could tell his cock was rubbing against those sweet pussy lips, she looked him in the eye and tilted her hips up to the right angle and slid back on his cock.
I think her eyes rolled back in her head as she slowly ground onto his cock – each stroke she went a little deeper until the whole nine inches was in that tight little pussy. It was then I realized she had forgot the condoms again. She started riding him and I could not take it anymore and undressed.
I was watching a stud plow my wife from ten foot away through a glass door and loving the sight. I was trying to time my strokes to hers and thinking about her pussy wrapped around his magnificent cock. I fell into a trance watching when I felt a hand on my shoulder.
I jumped and looked behind me but there was nothing there but darkness. I assumed it was my imagination and started getting into the show again when I felt it again. There was no mistaking it — someone was behind me leaning into my ear. I heard her hiss in my ear what a good little slut my wife was and that I should enjoy the show. I don’t know if she set it up or just wanted me to enjoy but I relaxed and we watched.
Soon they came together and hearing them so did I as I heard her hiss. I had cum in my hand as he came in her hot little pussy and I loved it. I never looked back to see my demon queen but could feel her there enjoying the show with me.
I heard her hiss in my ear to watch and they rolled onto their backs and started kissing again. She leaned down and started licking and then sucking his cock and soon he was hard again. She looked down and smiled at his recovery then pulled him on top of her and I watched her guide his cock into her waiting pussy.
I heard my demon whisper, “Good girl,” as my wife wrapped her ankles around his back and pulled him into her. How that big cock fit in her amazed me, but she looked like she was begging for more.
Slowly his hips started moving in and out and I knew he was filling her cunt to the limit. The harder he pumped the more she got into it and seemed to beg for more. I licked the cum from my hand as I enjoyed the show.
I continued to stroke my cock even though it was soft. I felt the presence still behind me and heard her giggled slightly as my wife slid down and started sucking him again. She looked like a kid with a new ice cream cone and soon he was hard again.
My demon let out a little hiss as my wife crawled on top of him again and slowly lowered her well lubricated pussy onto his cock again. As they were fucking for the third time I heard a long contented hiss and my demon was gone. He came again into her sweet little pussy, and she got up and led him by the cock like a leash into the shower.
When they came out, he tried to get dressed but she kept trying to suck his cock and laughed. Finally, he was dressed and she walked him to his car naked and kissed him then bent at the waist and kissed his cock and watched him drive away.
When she came in the house she texted me and I pretended to come home. She claimed they just made out and I didn’t let on I had watched until I was spooned up behind her and my cock got hard, I slipped it into her cum drenched cunt. She paused then slowly started grinding back onto me.
I held her hips tight and whispered into her ear that she was awfully wet for someone that had just, “Made out”. She froze and tried to pull away, but I held her tight. Then I whispered that I had watched the whole thing and that it was the single hottest thing I had ever seen, and she was my new favorite porn star.
She relaxed and slowly started pushing back onto my cock. Soon I deposited another load into her sweet little pussy and we fall asleep. The next morning was like before, she knew she had played but didn’t seem to remember the details or how much of a little slut she was.
I began to realize she did these things under the same kind of trance that I experience. The only question I have is my demon controlling her or does she have her own. Either way I’m enjoying it and don’t really want it to change. Her play has tapered off again and that’s okay — It simply builds the anticipation for the next adventure.
xxxxx
My Story
Chapter 6 – My Purpose
In my previous five chapters I explained how I met Lilith and how she controls me and possibly my wife. These stories are all true but not necessarily in order of occurrence but rather grouped to make some sense of my journey. I don’t understand it all but have come to several conclusions.
The first is that I still don’t know for sure who she is but strongly believe it to be Lilith or one of her daughters. Second thing is that I know she wants me to seduce certain people and get them to do things they really want to do but just need that little nudge. Third is that my wife appears to also be controlled but I don’t know if it’s the same demon or she has her own.
What I know is that she will occasionally act like a complete little whore and the next day only have vague memories of her actions. I also know that Lilith seemed to delight in watching her that one night with me as she looked over my shoulder like a proud parent or teacher.
I also know that when I assembled my altar to Lilith in our house my wife asked about it but never asked what it was. I also know the space and items are always clean and neatly arranged and not always in the position I left them. We don’t speak about it, but I feel like she uses it too. Forth and most important is that I appear to be some form of Succubus in training.
As odd as that sounds it also feels right. Lilith has appeared to me and asked me to do things or guided me and I always feel like a student. I have heard her in my head and occasionally out loud but have never actually seen her. I’ve seen glimpses, seen flashes, and even occasionally have seen her shape appear to me but never details. I’ve seen her naked but only in the shadows.
I’ve never seen her face clearly but still in the shadows have seen her beauty. If you asked me to draw her it would be simply sensuous shapes. In all of that I still feel close to her and feel like she is part of me and has a purpose for me. If you believe in reincarnation, then you might understand that I feel like this like this life is me earning the chance at the next life and that life is to be a succubus.
It’s what I crave, what I want, and what I am. I also know that most of the time I’m a masculine male but when I feel her take control my actions and behaviors and the core of my being seems to transform into something much more female.
xxxxx
There are two experiences about being guided into more and more feminine acts that I’d like to share and about how Lilith pushes my boundaries. How she leads me to do things I would not have thought of and though she doesn’t seem to command me, she does guide me.
I had long realized my attraction to guys and how easily I could comfortably slip into a feminine role, so it was no surprise when I started down that rabbit hole. I found myself flirting in chat rooms with guys and taking on a more feminine role and found one guy that I formed a connection with.
I learned that he lived in a small mountain town where being gay was not very popular nor were there many outlets to explore his attraction. As he talked, I felt her take over the keyboard and even though I could feel my hand doing the typing I found myself having to read the screen to know what I was typing. I read the words and kept thinking I can’t do that and finally in my head I heard her say to relax and let her lead.
The plan was for me to go to my little cabin in the woods for the weekend and dress as a woman and go visit him. The plan included picking a night when the guys across the street would see him having a date and stop thinking he was gay. It was all for show and the promise of sex was secondary.
He told me that that he lived on the top floor of a large Victorian house on a hill and that across the street a bunch of guys from the local college had rented out the house. He knew they suspected he was gay and would tease him about his lack of female friends. I was to show up after dark and have the guys see us on his balcony having a drink and maybe kissing and that hopefully that was enough to make his life on the street more bearable.
He loved the plan and I saw my hand set a date for Saturday night two weeks away. When she was done typing I re-read all that she had typed and got excited but wondered how I would pull this off. I still felt her presence and closed my eyes and said, “Show me.”
The next day I was putting suntan lotion on for a few minutes of tanning at the pool and it was old sunscreen. Before I realized it the gunk was smeared all over me and was clumping in my body hair. I realized the opportunity and after showing my wife the mess I shaved off all my body hair.
I went out and bought a make-up kit and started to practice applying it. I went shopping like I was shopping for the wife, and I decided on getting a little black dress and heels for my, “Date.”
I went in a department store and was fumbling thru the racks when a sales lady came over to help. She looked at what I was buying and slowly figured out they were for me. She played along that I was shopping for the wife for a while but after I had a dress picked out, she asked me if I was sure it would fit, and I stared at her blankly. She smiled warmly and nodded to the men’s dressing room.
I walked over to the men’s department and into the dressing room with several dresses over my arm. It was exciting trying them on and figured out my size and which dress fit me best. When I came out in my men’s clothes she was standing there and said we will have to find you hose to go with that and helped me pick out shear thigh-highs with a lace top.
She helped me check out. Buying a wig was also a chore but I realized I was not the first guy to buy a wig. I went into a wig shop and the two Asian ladies who ran the shop took me into a back room and fitted me with a wig that fit and matched my color. I was set — now to put it together.
I was out of time since my, “Date” was the next night and I packed up my usual fishing stuff for a weekend at the cabin … and one extra bag. Saturday morning came and I went fishing with a friend but came in at lunch to get ready. A long bath, shave my body again and lay everything out.
It took a long time but when I looked in the mirror, I was ready. I had on a short black dress, sheer hose and black heels. I had my hair just right and make-up a little heavy. I had on gold hoop earrings, a gold chain around my neck, a gold bracelet and a matching purse.
I don’t think anyone I knew would recognize me — I know I didn’t. I was ready. I was so excited to take my first trip out as a woman. I had decided on a name to fit my new appearance and told my online friend that Cyndie was going to visit him at nine-thirty on Saturday night.
As I was walking to my car, I heard an owl far off in the distance and knew that She was with me. The drive was fun and by the time I got to his house I was feeling more comfortable. I’m sure the joint I smoked on the way helped but as I parked, I realized that I was about to walk down a street with a bunch of drunk college boys watching me.
I felt like a hooker.
I fixed my makeup and my hair in the rear-view window and got out of the car as ladylike as possible. The clicking of my heels on the sidewalk announced my presence to the guys across the street and I heard a few comments they made in their, “Drunk whispers.”
They saw which house I was going to and I heard one guy say, “I thought he was gay” and they all laughed.
He met me at the door, I couldn’t resist and kissed him hello before stepping inside. Once inside he led me up the stairs to his apartment and poured me a glass of wine. He complimented me on my look and was excited about what the guys across the street had to say.
The mission was already accomplished but I was just getting started. As he showed me around his place it was beautiful. He had the entire top floor of an old Victorian and his bedroom was huge and had double French doors leading out to a large balcony which was directly across from the college guys.
Even with the trees they had a pretty good view. We turned on dim lights in the bedroom and went to the balcony to enjoy our wine. It didn’t take long for the guys to figure out we were on the balcony, and I heard a few of them walk onto theirs trying to be quiet.
They had no lights on, but I could make out their little faces in the dark watching us and trying hard to whisper. I had a nice buzz from the drive over and after a couple glasses of wine I was feeling flirty. I got up and went to the rail and pretended not to know the guys were there and my date joined me.
We chatted and after a while he leaned down and kissed me. Soon one kiss followed another and as we sat back down on the love seat we started making out. We could hear the comments from the guys watching us and it just fueled our passion. I was putting on a show and was loving having an audience. He had his hand on my thigh and started sliding it up and was delighted to feel that I was tucked and that the guys would not see the, “Real me.”
I opened his pants, unzipped him and lovingly pulled his cock out and admired it. A beautiful uncircumcised cock about seven inches and not to thick. I smiled then started licking then swallowing every inch enjoying feeling of him in my mouth.
The guys figured out what I was doing and made a few comments, but we ignored them. After all this show was for them. I kissed his cock and zipped him back up and you could her the groans of disappointment as I led him into the bedroom.
I’m sure they thought I would turn off the lights and close the curtains. The glass doors had shears on them and the gently breeze made them move in a sensuous way and I realized that if we left the doors open they could still see us.
He went to turn off the light and I bit his ear and said let them watch so he lit a few candles to illuminate the room. He undressed me but left my panties on and I lay down on the bed and watched him undress. We knew they could see us and that was the point.
He tugged at my panties, and I lifted my hips to help him remove them. Between us we managed to keep the sheets covering up my male parts and I opened my legs and offered my body to him. I had intended to just show up and maybe kiss him, but it felt too good to be a woman and I wanted what all woman want in the end.
He licked my hole and made it slippery and then positioned his cock at my opening and slowly slid in. It was not my first time being fucked but was my first time, “As a woman.”
I don’t know how but the mixture of his saliva and his precum was enough and he slowly slid into me. I’ve been fucked with lube and it feels great but this was different. I don’t know if my Demon had anything to do with it, but the feeling was like him sliding into silk. I could feel every vein and bump and it felt incredible.
I forgot about the boys across the street and made love to this man with my whole body. When he came, I could feel every drop of his cum coating me inside and I truly felt like a woman. After we came down off our high, I looked at him and smiled and said I was going to get my wine.
I pulled up a sheet to my chest like I’ve seen women do in the movies and walked outside on the balcony. My hair a mess and showing that fresh fucked glow I took a deep drink of my wine. I looked across the street and there were eight or ten faces watching me in the dark from the other balcony.
Knowing they had just watched us fuck I smiled at them and while making sure the sheets covered my chest and cock, I took a bow for my performance. They thought they were hidden in the dark but now knew we knew they were there, so they stood up and quietly applauded.
I gave them a little wave of acknowledgement and turned to go back in. While the sheet did cover my front, I made sure they could see my ass and knew I was still naked. I blew out the candles and curled up in his arms and went to sleep. In the morning he kissed me, and that kiss led to more and soon he was between my legs, and I was inviting him to make me feel like a woman again.
I walked down the street to my car and could feel his cum inside me and I felt somehow anew. I felt like I had passed into a new phase in my life, and it felt wonderful. When the sun hit my face, I had a warm feeling inside that she was pleased with me.
He said that after I left, they warmed to him and made him feel comfortable and even had him over for a few parties but always asked him about the hot little blonde. I did visit him a few more times and the guys would wave, and I’d smile.
We made love every single time I visited him sometimes several times and I always felt special when I left. Eventually he found a, “Special girl,” near him, she moved in, and he was happy so I faded away but still remember how it made me feel.
xxxxx
I would dress now and then just for fun but had to let my body hair grow back so I could not wear a dress in public again and that was fine. A few years later I had gotten sick and had lost a lot of weight.
Chemo has a side effect of making people lose their hair and it seems to affect people differently. I didn’t lose the hair on my head but the hair on my body was splotchy at best. I told my wife I was shaving it off just not to see the splotches and she understood.
Now I had also lost quite a bit of weight and when I looked in the mirror the combination of the lost weight and being shaved except for the hair on my head and a small patch above my little cock made me look feminine. I had been cured and felt pretty good but the weight was slow coming back and I kept shaving the hair.
One night after noticing how feminine I looked naked I went out on my patio with a glass of wine and in the dark I felt her presence creep back into my mind. I heard her tell me I’d be fine but how girly I looked and maybe it was time to invite Cyndie to come out and play. I smiled and the thought was gone.
My wife felt bad leaving me but had a week long business conference to attend and I encouraged her to go. The feeling that she might, “Play” while away along with the prospects of being Cyndie for a couple days made me almost push her out the door.
She left on a Thursday morning and Thursday night when I logged on to my computer there was an email that caught my eye. It was an invitation to a T-Girl event on Friday in a town about fifty miles away. I had never heard of the group sponsoring it and had no idea how they got my address then it dawned on me my Demon was at play.
Cyndie had not yet been in public, and this event was at an upscale bar and not a gay club. I called the number for more info and was informed that it was a private invite and that all the girls that were invited to this event were quite passable and that I had been referred to them.
I asked who referred me and she said it was a good friend of the group but would not say anything more. I just knew it was my Queen calling and decided to go. This would be a big step, but I’ve learned to trust her and do what she asks. The event was Saturday night, so I had plenty of time to get ready during the day.
I went out to buy a dress but decided on slacks and a sexy top. I went shopping and found a pair of black women’s slacks that accentuated my ass and a white sexy top that buttoned up the neck. I still had sexy black pumps and my wig but needed something special.
I went to a lingerie shop and bought a corset which really pulled my waist in. The woman helping me shop knew it was for me and helped me with the size and gave me instructions on how to lace it myself then smiled and said, “Have fun,” in a knowing way.
I got ready and added nice jewelry and picked out a little clutch for make-up touch up and essentials, I painted my nails and when I looked in the mirror, I loved what I saw. I drove to the bar and sat outside for twenty minutes fixing my hair and working up the nerve to go inside.
When I walked inside it was crowded but I knew what room the group was meeting in. A nice woman greeted me and complimented me on my look. She smiled and gave me the once over and then said understated and classy — I heard you would be a good fit.
She introduced me to the other girls, and they were beautiful. There were about a dozen of us, and a few had dates with them. Some had implants and were showing off their cleavage. I had on gel inserts pushed under my pecs and it made some pretty convincing cleavage under my corset, so I opened another button and got a drink.
After we toasted the night, we opened the doors and began to filter out into the regular bar. I walked around exploring the place and it was a nice with lots of private areas and several bars. I sat at a bar and ordered a white wine and was looking around when a lady I had never met walked up to me with a distinguished looking gentleman.
One look and I knew who she was — or who was guiding her. She had an exotic look. She had dark olive skin and looked like she was wearing no makeup but was simply beautiful. Her eyes were dark and pulled me in like a dream, and it seemed like she knew me.
She introduced me to Steve, and we started chatting. We turned and she was gone. He was handsome, about six-foot-three and obviously took care of his body. I was attracted even before he spoke, but his voice made my knees go weak.
I looked around I asked him how he knew her, and he said he didn’t — that he was there by himself, and she had walked up to him and without even a greeting said, “There is someone I want you to meet,” and walked him over to me.
We laughed about how odd that was but in the back of my mind I knew it was Lilith. I had learned to work on my voice and thought I sounded feminine, but this was my first time in public and I was nervous. Time flew by and I soon learned that he was a businessman in town for a few days — he was married but traveling alone, he had a suite in the luxury hotel a few blocks away and had simply wondered over after a late meeting.
After his second scotch he started flirting with me and soon we were touching each other and when he would lean in his hand was now not on the small of my back but on my ass. I looked at him and smiled and wondered if he knew my little secret. Finally, he was hinting about maybe heading back to his suite, presumably to see the view, and I knew I had to tell him.
His face registered shock and he excused himself and quickly walked off. I was hurt but knew it was better to tell him first. I walked around and found my little group in a corner, and I told them what happened. They told me it happens and to join them.
About a half hour later I noticed they had to all stopped talking and looked right past me, so I turned around and there he was with a bashful look on his face. He politely asked if we could speak, and I had to think about it for a minute but agreed.
I stepped aside with him, and he apologized for his rude departure and said he had never met a, “Girl” like me. He then asked if he could get me another glass of wine and, “Just talk” as he was enjoying our earlier conversation.
I looked at my new friends who knew he had run, and they also heard him apologize to me. I giggled and said, “What do you think girls” and they all said to give him another chance laughing.
There were about ten of us and now that Steve had joined me it was all couples. He whispered in my ear and asked if any of the other girls were like, “Me” and I laughed and whispered back yes … we all were.
He was shocked but as we chatted, he relaxed. We all hung out like old friends and he started to flirt with me again. As the night got late couples started getting up and leaving and he asked me again if I’d like to go check out the view from his suite and I kissed him gently and nodded yes.
A few of the girls teased us as we got up and asked us where we were heading. I smiled at them and took his arm headed for the door. On our way to the door, we saw the woman who had introduced us sitting by herself in the dark and she smiled and nodded her approval.
Steve commented that he still didn’t know her, but I just smiled. He offered to get a cab for the two block walk but I assured him I thought the walk would be nice and we walked down the street holding hands. The doorman opened the door for us, and we strolled in.
The lobby was huge and regally appointed and I held his arm past the desk and the manager looked up and smiled and said hello. I felt like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. As soon as the elevator door closed, we kissed a deep kiss and my knees got weak. The elevator door opened a few floors up and another guy got on, so we behaved the rest of the way to the top floor.
Once in his room we kissed for a little and it was nice. He ordered a bottle of champagne and by the time it arrived we were on the sofa kissing. We took a drink and then I excused myself to the bathroom. I wanted him so badly I ached. I took off my slacks and my blouse and walked back into the living room wearing only my corset hose and heels.
His smile was intoxicating and he pulled me in for a kiss. He took me by the hand and led me to the bedroom and we stepped out onto the balcony and the view was indeed incredible. Soon we were kissing and I took him by the hand and led him to the bed then asked him to get undressed.
Watching him undress was fun and his cock was already half hard and beautiful. Uncircumcised and thick with deep veins all up the shaft. I purred! He got a little nervous and said he had never done this with … and he paused. I said a girl like me, and he nodded.
I put my finger to his lips and pulled him onto the bed. I stood up and removed the corset and he didn’t register any disappointment. What followed was a long slow love making session with him guiding that beautiful cock in and out of me while I moaned my delight.
We were no longer just fucking, but making love. When he got close, I’d slow him down and make him pull out and then a few minutes later I’d lick his cock and tell him how much I wanted it back inside me. When he finally came, I could feel him twitch inside me and hugged him hard until he stopped.
We lay there for a while and finally I slid down and gently sucked his half hard cock. We fell asleep with my head on his chest and when I lowered my hand, I felt his cock respond. I stroked his cock until he was hard and turned over, so we were spooning.
As he kissed the back of my neck, I guided his cock inside me. With the earlier lubrication of his cum it slipped in smoothly and his hips started moving. With his left arm under my head, he put his right hand on my hip and began to slowly fuck me. It was gentle and strong and for the moment I was in love.
I felt him get close and I whispered to him to make me his girl again and I could feel push deep and cum inside me. That was the second time in my life I felt like I was a woman and not just playing one. We lay there for a long while then I asked him about his morning, he said he had an early meeting, so I told him to sleep and that I was going to go home.
He nodded and we exchanged numbers and I got dressed. We agreed he would call the next time he was in town alone and said I would have to get away from my wife too which he thought was funny. The walk through the lobby was my first public walk of shame and I felt like it was more of a victory lap.
I drove home and fell in bed tired but fulfilled. We did meet up a couple more times and each time was beautiful. I was his little princess away from home and loved playing the role. I got several more invitations from the group, but it never worked out in my schedule, and I never again saw the mystery lady. I still don’t know it I was finally looking into the eyes of Lilith or simply one of her other followers.
I am now a wanton little slut for my Queen and will do whatever she asks. Each experience has turned out incredible for me and I feel like I’m learning and always walk away feeling like I can’t wait for the next time. I have grown from a shy schoolboy to a hungry little bitch.
For now, I enjoy imagining that I’m her little succubus but hoping deep down that is exactly what I’m becoming. My confidence grows and since my re-awakening I often feel I’m the hunter. I don’t know for sure what the future holds, who does, but I feel like I know where I’m being guided.
While this might have taken a lifetime to get to here, I feel like a, “Lifetime,” is but a fleeting glimpse to her and that I will know my true calling in the next. I will add my experiences here from time to time but know that She is real and I am her’s.
THE END