Desensitization by Jennifer1972

Disclaimer: The following is fiction. The story’s content does not represent the writer’s beliefs, opinions, or attitudes. This story is intended for adult entertainment only. The characters and events depicted in this work are fictional. The author does not condone or promote unlawful activity as described in the story. By continuing to read this work, you acknowledge that you are an adult who wishes to read works of fantasy and fiction for the purpose only of fantasy. All the characters in this story are adults. They may play different ages for the fictional character they are depicting, but they remain at all times adults.

Writer: Jennifer1972

Subject: Desensitization

Link: FetLife / 25.10.2025

Desensitization

It’s curious how desensitized one becomes whilst sexually aroused to things normally considered by polite society to be disgusting. I pondered this last Thursday as I lay on my back in the barn with my face, neck and chest covered in horse cum. I had just masturbated the horse, working his twenty-one-inch cock with my left hand, with the head of the cock in my mouth, using my tongue to further stimulate him. My right hand was masturbating my own cock.

If you’ve never tried horse cock before, I highly recommend it. The horse loves it, and the first load spurting into one’s mouth is intoxicating and very powerful. You have more cum than your mouth can hold forced into you in an instant. I usually gag on that first spurt, but sometimes swallow it quickly before the second load gets shot into me. A horse ejaculates up to two cups of semen, with multiple ejaculations over a full one-minute period. It’s several dozen mouthfuls, so after each mouthful, you can either swallow it quickly or just allow each wave to overflow from your mouth and run down your neck.

I have settled into a routine of letting the first thirty seconds of cum spurts go into my mouth (and I alternate between swallowing and letting it run down my front), and then withdraw it and guide his cock to different parts of my face and neck for the remaining 30 seconds of cum spurts, splashing it all over my face. Then, when he’s finished, I place the tip of the cock back in my mouth to clean it off. But trust me, there’s nothing more satisfying than horse cock. It just keeps going, spurt after spurt after spurt. It’s a huge and satisfying load, delivered over a long, drawn-out orgasm. Much more satisfying than a man’s cock.

My journey into perversion has really taken off. I find I must keep pushing the boundaries into new and riskier activities, or boredom can set in. Riskier seems to be the key to new heights of sexual arousal.

As some readers here know, I also love scat. My love of my own masturbatory shit sessions eventually gave way to playing with strangers’ shit to avoid it getting boring. I now visit public toilets frequently, seeking unflushed bowls still containing shit. It’s no holds barred for me — turds, soft piles or really runny shit — I smear it all over myself, and of course, it was only natural that it would eventually escalate to swallowing it.

It’s riskier and more sexually arousing. And of course piss as well. Sometimes I find the men’s urinal blocked and filled with stinky yellow piss from multiple men and boys. I drink that until I’m bloated, and then enjoy watching all that piss from strangers re-emerge from my own cock half an hour later, often back into my own mouth for a new round of recycling.

The most amazing scat session I had was when I found a toilet with the bowl filled to the brim with very runny shit. Whoever deposited it had clogged the outlet with toilet paper and turds and then filled the rest of the bowl with diarrhoea and piss. I wasn’t sure if I would use it, but as I masturbated and became more and more aroused, and understanding the principle that with greater risk comes greater reward, I knew I would be indulging in it very soon. Before I knew it, I literally planted my face straight into the bowl and forced myself to push my head as far under as I could.

As I pulled out, copious amounts of runny shit and piss overflowed and poured all over my front and all over the floor. Then I reached in with both hands and cupped out all the contents, including the turds and used toilet paper, smearing it over every inch of me, including under and over my dress. I drank the runny mess as well. Yes, it led to a powerful orgasm. It also caused me to develop a sore tummy and then produce my own diarrhoea, which I then smeared all over myself.

Anyway, the reason I no longer take any precautions against diseases or bacteria or viruses is that my allowing them all in with abandon is the ultimate sexual gratification. They say the risk of getting caught is sexually arousing. Well risk of getting hurt is even more arousing. And ultimately, risk of premature death through disease is the highest level of sexual arousal possible, short of putting oneself in a position of immediate, certain death, such as jumping off a high cliff five seconds before orgasm and then orgasming in the knowledge that your life ends within seconds. I imagine that orgasm would be incredibly intense.

All of this occurred to me last year when I was raped by a man who caught me masturbating in the urinal in the sports grounds. I was wearing a skimpy pink dress and matching five-inch heels and sitting in the piss of men, with my own piss all up over my front, soaking the dress thoroughly. I guess he figured I was fair game and he wouldn’t let me leave. As I tried to walk past him, he grabbed me and threw me back onto the front of the urinal, where guys stand to piss.

The truth is, I didn’t put up a fight, or call out, or anything. Being raped was already a fantasy of mine, but I never knew how I would respond if it really happened. But it only took mere moments of lying on my back on the concrete with him lying on top of me and awkwardly trying to push his cock into my ass for me to notice my hard-on was returning.

I quickly resigned to the inevitability of the rape proceeding, so I used my hand to guide his cock to my hole, and he immediately began fucking me hard. I automatically wrapped my legs around his, put my hands on his back and held him tight, and relaxed my anus to let him have his way. My goal immediately became in alignment with his – we were now both working in unison to make him cum.

I guess technically it was no longer a rape as I was allowing it to proceed. But as I lay there, I thought about what I was about to receive. Obviously, my ass was about to fill with his cum, but what else? What disease or diseases did he have that were about to become mine as well?

The thought made my cock rock hard, and I instinctively began bucking my hips in rhythm with his thrusts. After I started doing that, it only took him another 30 seconds or so to orgasm, and he pumped six or seven loads into me before withdrawing. He stood up, then pissed on my face. I was surprised even myself when I, without even thinking, opened my mouth and made sure at least some of it went down my throat.

That rape supercharged my sex life from that day on. I couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that I probably now had an STI of some sort, because he didn’t use any protection whilst fucking me. It dawned on me that the worst was over, that there was nothing I could do to “undo” the STI and that I may as well take ownership of it.

It turned me on like I didn’t think possible. I wanted more. The more cum pumped into me by strangers and rug addicts, the more STIs I would have.

The very next day, I began dressing enticingly and going to shady parts of town where homeless men hung out. The idea was to be raped again, but as it happened, it’s very easy to just have sex with such people. Many of them are mentally ill or on drugs, and when they see what they think is a tranny in their territory wearing a short skirt or dress and heels, they just think sex. You only have to go up to them and open your legs, or reach into their pants, and they’ll fuck you. It’s not a rape, although they make it pretty damn clear they won’t stop if you try to push them away.

Over the next few months, I took in the cum of several hundred different men, without ever using protection. The more I did it, the more confident I felt that I probably had multiple STIs and no longer had anything left to lose. It was incredible how elevated my sexual arousal became.

You see, if you already have whatever STIs there are, you have nothing to lose. Nothing to avoid. Nothing to worry about. You become a free agent, having unprotected sex with any man, woman, boy or girl without a care in the world. You can drink the piss and shit of anyone. You can climb down into a long drop toilet and bury your face into the pile of shit at the bottom. And you can certainly put the head of a horse’s cock into your mouth and enjoy the sixty seconds of ejaculated semen spurting onto your face, into your mouth and running down your front over your tits, down your tummy and onto your own girl cock.

You also become what I call a “spreader”. Because, of course, if you have all these STIs, you are also spreading those STIs to everyone else who fucks you or who you fuck. That is also extremely satisfying. The best “spreading” I ever had was two months ago when the homeless guys were fucking me as usual. There was a girl with them, about eleven or twelve, apparently also homeless.

The guys noticed I kept staring at her and asked me if I wanted to fuck her. I said I would love to, but was unsure if it would be safe. I mean, someone present might object to seeing an eleven or twelve-year-old fucked by a forty-five-year-old shemale, but before I said anything else, one of the guys grabbed her and dragged her over to me and told her to get on her back and open her legs. She was only wearing a top and a short denim skirt, and didn’t even have to pull it up. It was so short that when she opened her legs, her cunt was fully exposed.

I climbed onto her, pushed my seven inches inside as far as it would go, and began fucking. I’m not sure what part was more arousing – the feel of her young, tight cunt against my shaft, or knowing that in a few minutes I would be changing her life forever, and possibly shortening it, by dumping a load of all my STIs into her. The thought certainly gave me a powerful orgasm as I felt surge after surge of my cum going into her. I looked at her innocent face as I transferred my fluids into her. I was both giving to her and taking from her.

By the way, for those who don’t know, I have been taking hormones for the past two years so that I can convincingly look like a woman. I have the curves and boobs now. I had to convince the medical professionals that I suffer from gender dysphoria, and I even managed to cry and tell them a sob story about how “I just want to be me”. But of course it was a lie.

Let me be clear. I’m not transgender. I’m a shemale. I’m a guy with a girl’s body, complete with a cock. I am highly sexualized, and my life is about the pursuit of orgasm through perversion.

With a female appearance, I get to turn myself on. I get sexually aroused at the sight of myself in the mirror and from touching my body. From wearing skimpy dresses in public and making heads turn.

With my new appearance, I now have unchallenged access to women’s bathrooms. I can go into a stall and masturbate whilst girls and women piss and shit in the stalls either side of me. And I can, and do, play with their piss and shit when their toilet doesn’t flush, which it often doesn’t because I turn off the water.

I can walk the street and turn men on.

My driver’s license says F. My passport says Female. It’s a lie, but it’s all legal thanks to liberal lefties who made it possible for anyone to be anything.

I am now living the ultimate perverted life. A new sexualized female body with a cock. Fucking men. Men fucking me. Sucking horse cock. Fucking little girls when I get the chance. And playing with piss and shit and consuming it.

What’s left for me? We will see. I like the idea of giving eleven-year-old boys their first sexual experience. To suck their little cocks and teach them to cum. I’m sure I will find such boys somewhere.

I have also toyed with the idea of not changing my clothes or washing for a month despite regular scat sessions. I trialled it once, returning home covered in piss and shit, with my piss soaked dress clinging to my body, and I simply went to bed. The next day, it was dry and very smelly, but I went about my day normally before returning to the public toilets for a new session, where I added new piss and shit to the dry piss and shit that already covered me. But that was only two days. I think I could go a lot longer.

If you’re ever in my neck of the woods, get in touch. I am a guaranteed fuck for those brave enough. I am extremely submissive and shy despite what I’ve written. You will absolutely have your way with me. Or you can just watch me have fun if you wish to avoid the STIs. Watch me suck off a horse. Watch me piss and shit on myself. Or you can piss and shit on me if you prefer. Video me. Put me on a porn site and profit from me without giving me a cent.

I am always open to new perversions, and wonder what comes next. It’s exciting.

And by the way, I have never gained an idea from any other source. Every sexual idea I’ve ever had has come to me naturally. I assume it is Lilith guiding me to dark places. To sexual encounters, forced or consensual. To horses. To homeless men. To young girls. I love it all.

THE END